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Jason and the Argonauts

are heading this way.

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Looks like they want

to fight an army

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of hairless, grinning women.

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Those are skeletons.

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Why would you

fight a skeleton?

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Seems like punching down.

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But you'd fight an army

of hairless, grinning women?

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If they started it.

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Did you see them?

They look pretty menacing.

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They look menacing because

they're skeletons, darling.

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I don't know.

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When I see a skeleton, I don't

think, oh, here comes trouble.

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I think, there goes someone

that got into trouble

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several years ago.

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The Argonauts' battles

are always pretty epic.

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Yeah.

I'm on the edge of my seat.

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A fight with a skeleton.

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How do you know

when you're finished?

00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:36,305

Wait--they'll have to stop

here for supplies.

00:00:36,305 --> 00:00:38,545

They won't stop here,

they'll stop in Supplesia.

00:00:38,545 --> 00:00:40,982

The Supplesians practically

invented supplies.

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Yes, but they also

bragged about it,

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so Poseidon turned

them all into supplies,

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and they had to use

themselves to death.

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Which makes Krapopolis

a must-stop for the Argonauts.

00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:51,637

But does that

put us in danger?

00:00:51,637 --> 00:00:53,841

It's not like we're

mankind's greatest threat,

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its own skeleton.

00:00:55,377 --> 00:00:57,181

Guys, Homer travels

with the Argonauts.

00:00:57,181 --> 00:00:58,250

What's Homer?

00:00:58,250 --> 00:00:59,853

Everywhere the Argonauts go

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gets referenced

in a Homer poem.

00:01:01,456 --> 00:01:03,595

If we could get

a favorable mention,

00:01:03,595 --> 00:01:05,898

I mean, preferably involving

something touristy

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like our delicious kebabs.

00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:08,637

Everyone knows

our kebabs suck.

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Sounds like we have

world-famous kebabs.

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Work with me here, Stupendous.

00:01:14,448 --> 00:01:16,219

- Ah!

- It's just a message orb.

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Ignore it.

- A message orb?

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Ah, what the--

00:01:19,124 --> 00:01:20,728

Yes, it zaps you

until you answer.

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It zapped me!

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It'll make the rounds.

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Ignore it, I said.

This is family time.

00:01:24,435 --> 00:01:26,372

Ow.

Can you answer it already?

00:01:26,372 --> 00:01:28,109

Nobody answers

on the second zap.

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I don't want to seem desperate.

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Ow. Why me twice?

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You showed weakness.

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Oh, fine.

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Deliria, I hope

this finds you well.

00:01:37,528 --> 00:01:40,467

I'm hosting a very special,

very exclusive retreat

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on my private island,

and I'd love you to be there.

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Oh, mama likey.

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But you simply must bring

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your little mortal king,

Tedious.

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What? Mama confusey.

00:01:51,022 --> 00:01:52,759

Does Hestia know you?

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Oh, yeah, clearly.

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We're on a wrong name basis.

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It's the pinkish blue

paradisey thing

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at the center

of the Three Realms.

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If you see a pyramid,

you've gone too far.

00:02:01,977 --> 00:02:03,113

Don't go, Ty.

00:02:03,113 --> 00:02:04,348

This island sounds

like a kill box

00:02:04,348 --> 00:02:06,319

where gods hunt man for sport.

00:02:06,319 --> 00:02:07,856

- That's a thing?

- Oh, don't be silly.

00:02:07,856 --> 00:02:08,891

We're gods.

00:02:08,891 --> 00:02:10,861

The entire world

is our kill box.

00:02:10,861 --> 00:02:12,231

Still, if it's all the same,

00:02:12,231 --> 00:02:13,968

I'll stay here and tend

to the Argonauts.

00:02:13,968 --> 00:02:15,437

Nice try.

00:02:15,437 --> 00:02:18,544

A Hestia invite never happens,

and she said I must bring you.

00:02:18,544 --> 00:02:21,182

- She called me Tedious.

- She ain't wrong.

00:02:21,182 --> 00:02:22,786

Now, are you going to

keep pouting like a baby,

00:02:22,786 --> 00:02:25,323

or are you going to grow up and

let me carry you to a party?

00:02:25,323 --> 00:02:26,827

All right,

but the rest of you

00:02:26,827 --> 00:02:29,198

have to get this place decent

for Jason and the Argonauts.

00:02:29,198 --> 00:02:31,268

- Decent?

- What's that supposed to mean?

00:02:31,268 --> 00:02:33,173

Well, you know, these people

are better than we are.

00:02:33,173 --> 00:02:34,475

- What?

- Excuse me.

00:02:34,576 --> 00:02:36,345

If you've got the energy

to be offended by that,

00:02:36,345 --> 00:02:38,183

you've got the energy

to clean up the dock.

00:02:38,183 --> 00:02:39,485

Get rid of the fish smell.

00:02:39,485 --> 00:02:42,324

I don't want any more pushback,

I'm your king.

00:02:42,424 --> 00:02:44,462

Make sure the Argonauts

have a good time.

00:02:44,462 --> 00:02:46,332

Have fun at your kill box.

00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:47,836

It's not a kill box.

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Hestia's private island.

00:03:16,225 --> 00:03:18,664

There are Olympians who

would kill to be here.

00:03:18,664 --> 00:03:21,369

I haven't been

to a lot of parties,

00:03:21,469 --> 00:03:23,440

but this one seems weak.

00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:25,645

Well, it only goes to show

how little you understand

00:03:25,645 --> 00:03:28,183

the--wait a minute.

Broseidon's here.

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Babe, are you being

serious right now?

00:03:30,020 --> 00:03:31,189

Just pick something.

00:03:31,189 --> 00:03:32,859

Well I'm not sure

what I want.

00:03:32,859 --> 00:03:34,228

Come on.

00:03:34,228 --> 00:03:36,098

Are you trying to embarrass me?

00:03:36,098 --> 00:03:37,502

Either the Hestia cachet

00:03:37,502 --> 00:03:39,205

or my memory

seems to have slipped.

00:03:39,205 --> 00:03:40,775

What do you say?

Ten minutes? Five?

00:03:40,875 --> 00:03:43,212

Just show our faces to Hestia

and then bolt?

00:03:43,212 --> 00:03:45,718

Greetings,

mortal and immortal pairs.

00:03:45,818 --> 00:03:49,258

My beloved Humanus and I

welcome you to a weekend

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you will never forget.

00:03:50,895 --> 00:03:54,636

A weekend that will

leave you changed and renewed.

00:03:54,636 --> 00:03:57,441

If my fellow gods and goddesses

will hold your hands

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over the nearest open flame,

00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:02,451

you will experience

something profound.

00:04:04,054 --> 00:04:05,257

I was gonna

do that anyway.

00:04:05,257 --> 00:04:06,928

Whoa! Whoa!

00:04:06,928 --> 00:04:07,996

Is that, like, pain?

00:04:07,996 --> 00:04:09,699

Indeed it is.

00:04:09,699 --> 00:04:13,273

The pollen of the brotos

flower, unique to this island,

00:04:13,273 --> 00:04:15,410

has the rather extraordinary

property

00:04:15,410 --> 00:04:17,649

of canceling out

our godly powers.

00:04:17,649 --> 00:04:21,288

You've been breathing it in

since you arrived.

00:04:21,288 --> 00:04:23,327

You've been spiking the air?

00:04:23,327 --> 00:04:25,264

Now, now. Don't panic.

00:04:25,264 --> 00:04:27,134

It's good for you.

00:04:27,134 --> 00:04:29,506

Cleansing. Therapeutic.

00:04:29,506 --> 00:04:33,547

An opportunity to free yourself

from the prison of eternity,

00:04:33,547 --> 00:04:38,056

and to achieve levels

of intimacy and understanding

00:04:38,056 --> 00:04:39,659

never imagined possible.

00:04:39,659 --> 00:04:41,329

I already

understand everything.

00:04:41,329 --> 00:04:42,599

I don't need to understand him.

00:04:42,599 --> 00:04:45,170

Well, you can try

to leave if you like.

00:04:47,441 --> 00:04:51,415

Here on Vitalis,

gods and humans are equal.

00:04:51,415 --> 00:04:52,586

- What?

- What?

00:04:52,586 --> 00:04:53,521

Ugh.

Then we leave by boat.

00:04:53,521 --> 00:04:55,491

You know how to build

a boat, don't you?

00:04:55,491 --> 00:04:57,996

Actually, I'm suddenly

very interested

00:04:57,996 --> 00:05:01,236

in staying the whole weekend.

00:05:01,236 --> 00:05:03,339

And no, about the boat.

00:05:03,339 --> 00:05:05,143

I can't believe our brother

said these people

00:05:05,143 --> 00:05:06,278

are better than us.

00:05:06,278 --> 00:05:08,216

We're gonna show them

a good time.

00:05:08,216 --> 00:05:09,886

We don't have to clean.

- Right?

00:05:09,886 --> 00:05:11,823

Like we're gonna make

such a bad impression.

00:05:11,823 --> 00:05:14,461

Totally ridiculous.

Ty needs to relax.

00:05:18,638 --> 00:05:21,209

Greetings, good people of--

00:05:21,209 --> 00:05:23,514

Oh, my God. The smell.

00:05:23,514 --> 00:05:25,483

What is that?

00:05:25,483 --> 00:05:27,454

Oh, come on.

It's not that bad.

00:05:27,454 --> 00:05:28,791

Not that bad?

00:05:28,791 --> 00:05:31,028

All right, Argonauts,

back on the boat.

00:05:31,028 --> 00:05:32,197

- Wait, what?

- No!

00:05:32,197 --> 00:05:33,601

Hold on just a second.

00:05:33,601 --> 00:05:35,336

How dare you

touch our rigging.

00:05:35,336 --> 00:05:37,575

Rigging?

This is a mooring line.

00:05:37,575 --> 00:05:38,778

We call

all the ropes rigging.

00:05:38,778 --> 00:05:41,215

What are you?

The boat word police?

00:05:41,215 --> 00:05:45,189

Give me.

- Stay for our famous kebab.

00:05:45,189 --> 00:05:47,829

You do not give me orders,

you bi--

00:05:53,006 --> 00:05:53,774

Um...

00:05:53,908 --> 00:05:56,514

Well, they're all dead,

so at least

00:05:56,514 --> 00:05:59,085

there certainly can't be

a story about it.

00:06:02,290 --> 00:06:03,561

Is that Homer?

00:06:03,561 --> 00:06:05,364

Hey, where are

those Argonauts?

00:06:05,364 --> 00:06:06,733

Did they run ahead?

00:06:07,936 --> 00:06:09,238

Yes.

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Running away?

00:06:13,246 --> 00:06:15,818

You're that unwilling to give

this equality thing a chance?

00:06:15,818 --> 00:06:18,624

Not everything deserves

a chance, Tyrannis.

00:06:18,624 --> 00:06:21,061

In fact, most things don't.

00:06:21,061 --> 00:06:22,097

You realize what this is?

00:06:22,263 --> 00:06:25,204

Hestia just finally lost her

weirdly famous virginity,

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and now she thinks she and her

mortal boyfriend invented sex.

00:06:29,946 --> 00:06:32,050

Ugh.

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I can see you're upset.

00:06:33,386 --> 00:06:34,856

Oh, of course,

you're loving this.

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Seeing me powerless

is your dream come true.

00:06:37,596 --> 00:06:40,768

I did feel that

for a rather wonderful moment,

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but I actually think

this could be a good thing.

00:06:43,073 --> 00:06:44,341

A whole new way for gods

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and mortals to relate

to each other.

00:06:45,879 --> 00:06:48,450

We already have a way that's

worked for thousands of years.

00:06:48,551 --> 00:06:49,952

It's called worship.

00:06:49,952 --> 00:06:52,424

Well, I think doing this

is going to be good for you.

00:06:52,424 --> 00:06:53,794

And whether or not

you agree with me,

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it is what you're

going to be doing.

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I don't suppose

there's any chance

00:06:57,134 --> 00:06:59,371

you'll make even the tiniest

effort this weekend?

00:06:59,371 --> 00:07:00,340

Don't hold your breath.

00:07:00,440 --> 00:07:01,510

Well, don't you

hold your breath, either,

00:07:01,510 --> 00:07:02,545

because you'll die.

00:07:02,545 --> 00:07:04,214

You really are tedious.

00:07:04,214 --> 00:07:05,450

Why do you have to do that?

00:07:05,450 --> 00:07:06,586

Why do you always have

to have the last word?

00:07:06,753 --> 00:07:09,692

Ask me that 1,000 years

after your death.

00:07:12,364 --> 00:07:14,201

I can't believe some

of them are actually

00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:15,504

participating in this charade.

00:07:15,504 --> 00:07:17,441

Imprisoned, violated, and what?

00:07:17,441 --> 00:07:18,577

Just playing along?

00:07:18,677 --> 00:07:20,514

Maybe they don't

feel violated, Mom.

00:07:20,514 --> 00:07:23,386

Maybe they find it

therapeutical, as advertised.

00:07:23,386 --> 00:07:25,925

Oh, this--

what did you call it?

00:07:25,925 --> 00:07:28,363

- Mild indigestion.

- It's unbearable.

00:07:28,363 --> 00:07:30,066

You said this just

happens sometimes?

00:07:30,066 --> 00:07:34,642

I had no idea, babe, that you

could be feeling this ever.

00:07:34,642 --> 00:07:36,445

It sucks to be you.

00:07:36,445 --> 00:07:38,684

Oh, Broseidon.

00:07:38,684 --> 00:07:40,487

Well, see? That's nice.

00:07:40,487 --> 00:07:41,757

Oh, come off it.

00:07:41,757 --> 00:07:43,894

Do you not see that

they're making fun of you?

00:07:43,894 --> 00:07:47,535

The meaninglessness

of your brief, stupid lives.

00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:49,405

Beginning to see the appeal?

00:07:49,405 --> 00:07:51,108

I believe I am, yes.

00:07:52,545 --> 00:07:54,950

Wait--this is about

laughing at mortals.

00:07:54,950 --> 00:07:57,354

I thought this was

about us being equal.

00:07:57,354 --> 00:07:59,091

I apologize, Hestia.

00:07:59,091 --> 00:08:00,427

You know mortals.

00:08:00,427 --> 00:08:01,630

Oh, no, no, no.

00:08:01,730 --> 00:08:02,799

It's quite all right.

00:08:02,799 --> 00:08:04,936

They do get excited,

don't they?

00:08:05,638 --> 00:08:06,840

What else do you have here?

00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:10,146

Oh, a range of treatments,

big and small.

00:08:10,146 --> 00:08:11,449

Physical exhaustion.

00:08:11,550 --> 00:08:12,585

Arm fell asleep.

00:08:12,585 --> 00:08:13,954

Fecal urgency.

00:08:13,954 --> 00:08:15,891

Being snuck up on,

but then realizing

00:08:15,891 --> 00:08:17,695

it was a statue

and feeling dumb.

00:08:17,695 --> 00:08:18,998

Knowing people

are talking about you,

00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:21,537

but having no way to know

what they're saying.

00:08:21,537 --> 00:08:23,874

Oh, this is too much.

00:08:23,874 --> 00:08:26,145

Hestia, I'm sorry

I doubted you.

00:08:26,245 --> 00:08:27,916

This is divine.

00:08:27,916 --> 00:08:29,652

Ugh.

00:08:29,652 --> 00:08:31,489

He's in his room

getting cleaned up.

00:08:31,489 --> 00:08:33,426

How lucky are we

that Homer's blind?

00:08:33,426 --> 00:08:35,664

The gods are truly

smiling upon us.

00:08:35,664 --> 00:08:36,833

Did he ask about the Argonauts?

00:08:36,833 --> 00:08:37,935

Yeah, I didn't know

what to tell him,

00:08:37,935 --> 00:08:41,242

so he just said they're

in an orgy with themselves.

00:08:41,242 --> 00:08:42,210

Perfect cover story.

00:08:42,410 --> 00:08:45,551

According to the gossip

I've heard, it's airtight.

00:08:45,551 --> 00:08:47,420

And I do mean airtight.

00:08:47,420 --> 00:08:48,557

What the hell do we do next?

00:08:48,557 --> 00:08:49,760

When he finds out

what's happened,

00:08:49,860 --> 00:08:52,766

we've not only proved Ty right

by not doing what he wanted,

00:08:52,766 --> 00:08:54,903

we've proved him super right

by achieving

00:08:54,903 --> 00:08:57,107

pretty much the opposite

of what he wanted.

00:08:57,107 --> 00:08:57,943

It is true.

00:08:57,943 --> 00:09:00,079

To be the villains

of an Homeric epic

00:09:00,079 --> 00:09:02,918

might not have the desired

effect on the tourist crowd.

00:09:02,918 --> 00:09:05,190

Hippo, is there any way

you can make those guys alive?

00:09:05,190 --> 00:09:07,695

That technology is

three years away, at least.

00:09:07,695 --> 00:09:09,700

Dang it.

We're still screwed.

00:09:09,700 --> 00:09:11,001

Hang on.

Let's just think about this.

00:09:11,001 --> 00:09:13,573

Perhaps there's a way

to turn it to our advantage.

00:09:13,573 --> 00:09:15,443

What is true about blind men?

00:09:15,443 --> 00:09:16,747

They like sitting

on the ground.

00:09:16,747 --> 00:09:19,218

And tin cups.

They love tin cups.

00:09:19,218 --> 00:09:20,287

And?

00:09:20,454 --> 00:09:22,858

They experience everything

through their other senses.

00:09:22,858 --> 00:09:25,531

Exactly.

We've got work to do.

00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:27,535

Right, this way,

Homer, old boy.

00:09:27,535 --> 00:09:28,703

The Argonauts await.

00:09:28,703 --> 00:09:30,841

- Ah. I smell kebabs.

- Yes.

00:09:30,841 --> 00:09:34,247

Krapopolis has kebabs

in tremendous quantities.

00:09:34,247 --> 00:09:37,989

And your friends didn't wanna

start eating without you.

00:09:37,989 --> 00:09:40,393

Oh, you didn't have

to do that, lads.

00:09:40,393 --> 00:09:41,462

Tin cup?

00:09:41,462 --> 00:09:43,601

Shall we dig in, all of us?

00:09:43,601 --> 00:09:45,605

Mmm, mmm, mmm, yes.

00:09:45,605 --> 00:09:48,142

- Mmm.

- Mmm, mmm.

00:09:49,612 --> 00:09:51,517

So Jason,

tell me about the orgy.

00:09:51,517 --> 00:09:54,021

Uh, uh.

00:09:55,323 --> 00:09:56,392

What was that?

00:09:56,392 --> 00:09:58,129

Oh, that's our giant serpent.

00:09:58,129 --> 00:10:01,336

It has swords sticking out

all over it.

00:10:01,336 --> 00:10:03,139

It's terribly dangerous.

00:10:03,139 --> 00:10:05,611

Sounds like something

we Argonauts should fight.

00:10:05,711 --> 00:10:07,247

- Oh, yes.

- Yeah.

00:10:09,953 --> 00:10:12,525

Ooh, that doesn't

sound like a good idea.

00:10:12,625 --> 00:10:13,794

It's a dangerous animal.

00:10:13,794 --> 00:10:15,765

Yeah,

and it's never lost a battle.

00:10:15,765 --> 00:10:19,238

I've gone up against it

many times, and I've...

00:10:19,238 --> 00:10:21,375

never beaten it.

00:10:22,578 --> 00:10:24,414

We have to fight that thing.

00:10:24,414 --> 00:10:25,717

Are you sure?

00:10:25,717 --> 00:10:28,389

It's nowhere as easy

to kill as human skeletons.

00:10:30,093 --> 00:10:34,101

But have at it, oh brave

destroyers of human remains.

00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:34,836

Argonauts!

00:10:34,836 --> 00:10:36,706

both:

Argonauts!

00:10:39,278 --> 00:10:40,747

Mortality.

00:10:40,747 --> 00:10:43,019

I get it now.

I really do.

00:10:43,019 --> 00:10:45,089

No, you don't, Mom.

You know how I know?

00:10:45,089 --> 00:10:46,391

Because you're

enjoying yourself.

00:10:47,762 --> 00:10:50,901

Oh, relax and have fun

like everyone else.

00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:53,473

Of course,

I don't get mortality.

00:10:53,473 --> 00:10:54,709

That's the whole joke.

00:10:54,709 --> 00:10:57,347

My mortality

is itself temporary.

00:10:57,347 --> 00:11:00,988

Frankly, the alternative

is unthinkable and offensive.

00:11:00,988 --> 00:11:03,359

Well, I'm sorry

my mortality has always been

00:11:03,459 --> 00:11:04,795

such an insult to you.

00:11:04,795 --> 00:11:07,201

Are those apologies I hear?

00:11:07,201 --> 00:11:10,006

Sounds like somebody

is making progress.

00:11:10,106 --> 00:11:13,045

Now, the real trust building

can begin.

00:11:13,045 --> 00:11:14,815

See you

at the final event tonight.

00:11:14,815 --> 00:11:16,987

It's a gas.

You're going to love it.

00:11:16,987 --> 00:11:19,058

I don't suppose there's

any chance you'll make

00:11:19,058 --> 00:11:21,563

even the tiniest effort

tonight?

00:11:24,903 --> 00:11:26,607

Stupid...

00:11:26,607 --> 00:11:28,778

God problems?

00:11:28,778 --> 00:11:30,614

Yeah. How did you guess?

00:11:30,714 --> 00:11:32,150

I mean, my name is Tony.

00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:33,988

Humanus is just

what Hestia calls me.

00:11:33,988 --> 00:11:36,826

No kidding?

That's--yeesh.

00:11:36,826 --> 00:11:39,097

Yeesh is right, but it's not

our job to fix them.

00:11:39,097 --> 00:11:41,002

They're never gonna change,

and that's just fine

00:11:41,002 --> 00:11:43,840

because we are gonna be around

long after they're gone.

00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:46,747

Yes. Right?

I mean--oh, my God.

00:11:46,747 --> 00:11:49,385

It feels so good to hear

someone else say that.

00:11:49,385 --> 00:11:50,486

And you know what else?

00:11:50,486 --> 00:11:52,758

She, Hestia, got my name wrong.

00:11:52,758 --> 00:11:54,829

But what's so funny is,

I was offended

00:11:54,829 --> 00:11:56,633

because of the specific way

she got it wrong.

00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:57,802

You know what?

00:11:57,802 --> 00:11:59,271

I don't even need

to hear all the details.

00:11:59,271 --> 00:12:01,509

I am familiar with that

whole routine, believe me.

00:12:01,509 --> 00:12:02,912

We are on the same page, brother.

00:12:02,912 --> 00:12:05,383

Tedious.

She called me Tedious.

00:12:05,383 --> 00:12:06,419

What?

00:12:21,550 --> 00:12:23,219

Let's go!

00:12:23,219 --> 00:12:24,421

Hah!

00:12:26,560 --> 00:12:28,430

Hah!

00:12:28,430 --> 00:12:30,701

Skeletons were easy.

00:12:32,204 --> 00:12:35,209

So when did you

actually kill them?

00:12:35,209 --> 00:12:36,779

The second they

stepped off the boat?

00:12:36,779 --> 00:12:39,017

- Uh...

- You knew this whole time?

00:12:39,017 --> 00:12:40,787

You were overperforming, Stupe.

00:12:40,787 --> 00:12:42,959

You gave it away.

- I was living in the moment.

00:12:42,959 --> 00:12:44,829

An actor makes choices.

00:12:44,929 --> 00:12:46,933

Oh, how dumb

do you think I am?

00:12:46,933 --> 00:12:49,004

I just wanted to see

how far you were gonna go

00:12:49,004 --> 00:12:52,010

with this hacky, problematic,

let's-fool-the-blind-guy bit.

00:12:52,010 --> 00:12:53,012

And I'll give you this:

00:12:53,012 --> 00:12:55,049

you went a lot further

than I thought possible.

00:12:55,049 --> 00:12:56,853

You wanna maybe

tell a story about

00:12:56,853 --> 00:12:58,590

how cool we are

with sound design?

00:12:58,690 --> 00:13:00,393

Maybe?

00:13:00,393 --> 00:13:01,897

No?

00:13:11,082 --> 00:13:12,384

So glad you've made

a little friend.

00:13:12,384 --> 00:13:14,421

Have you finished sulking now?

- You know--

00:13:14,421 --> 00:13:18,964

Friends, welcome to

the closing ceremony.

00:13:19,064 --> 00:13:22,370

The tea you are holding

will purge the flower's effect

00:13:22,370 --> 00:13:23,272

from your system.

00:13:23,372 --> 00:13:26,680

Drink now, and you

will be gods once more.

00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:28,248

- May I?

- Of course.

00:13:28,248 --> 00:13:31,054

My beloved Humanus.

- Thank you.

00:13:31,054 --> 00:13:33,827

My friends, humans,

gathered gods,

00:13:33,827 --> 00:13:35,865

you have now experienced

a world in which

00:13:35,865 --> 00:13:38,302

gods and humans are equal.

00:13:38,302 --> 00:13:42,010

Now I ask you to visualize

a world without gods at all.

00:13:44,849 --> 00:13:46,252

- What?

- Ladies and gentlemen,

00:13:46,252 --> 00:13:48,222

the antidote will not

be served tonight.

00:13:48,222 --> 00:13:50,761

What you've been drinking

is hot water.

00:13:50,761 --> 00:13:52,565

Water?

00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:55,470

The age of man begins today.

00:13:55,470 --> 00:13:56,773

Down with the gods!

00:13:59,879 --> 00:14:01,482

It's happening!

00:14:01,482 --> 00:14:02,584

No!

00:14:05,957 --> 00:14:08,028

I don't like your friend.

00:14:12,036 --> 00:14:14,976

I think I'm having

a panic attack.

00:14:14,976 --> 00:14:16,613

Mother, we've already

been over this.

00:14:16,613 --> 00:14:18,382

That's just called breathing.

00:14:18,382 --> 00:14:19,885

Oh, yes.

00:14:19,885 --> 00:14:21,021

I don't like it.

00:14:21,021 --> 00:14:22,190

Here.

We can stop for a second.

00:14:22,190 --> 00:14:23,660

I think we've lost them, anyway.

00:14:23,660 --> 00:14:24,796

What happened back there?

00:14:24,796 --> 00:14:27,768

I-I don't understand.

- What's not to understand?

00:14:27,768 --> 00:14:29,404

Your friend

is a violent extremist

00:14:29,404 --> 00:14:31,810

who thinks the subjugation

of humans by the gods

00:14:31,810 --> 00:14:33,814

is somehow out of line.

00:14:33,814 --> 00:14:35,316

It's a ludicrous philosophy

for which

00:14:35,316 --> 00:14:37,755

no imaginable extremes

of contempt

00:14:37,755 --> 00:14:39,491

could possibly suffice.

00:14:39,491 --> 00:14:40,694

But a surprise.

00:14:40,694 --> 00:14:42,030

I'm not sure it's ludicrous.

00:14:42,130 --> 00:14:43,600

The murder part

I disagree with, but--

00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:47,307

Lowliness often doesn't agree

with the lowly, Tyrannis.

00:14:47,307 --> 00:14:49,645

Most, however,

know better than to try

00:14:49,645 --> 00:14:50,981

to do something about it.

00:14:50,981 --> 00:14:53,687

Revolution is very desperate.

00:14:53,687 --> 00:14:55,891

Mom, look out.

00:14:55,891 --> 00:14:57,127

How does it work?

00:14:57,127 --> 00:14:59,666

If it touches me, do I die?

00:14:59,766 --> 00:15:01,970

Or how many stabs does it take?

00:15:01,970 --> 00:15:03,072

Just don't get stabbed

at all.

00:15:03,072 --> 00:15:04,742

So even one might do it?

00:15:04,742 --> 00:15:07,480

Does it matter how deep?

00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:08,951

Oh, my God.

00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:10,754

That was crazy.

00:15:10,754 --> 00:15:12,156

Continue to flee?

00:15:12,156 --> 00:15:15,463

Yes, yes. Continue to flee.

00:15:16,933 --> 00:15:18,435

We found another

ship for you.

00:15:18,435 --> 00:15:20,439

But Homer, is there

anything we can do

00:15:20,439 --> 00:15:22,578

to convince you

not to tell this story

00:15:22,578 --> 00:15:24,114

exactly as it happened?

00:15:24,114 --> 00:15:25,851

I'm offended

by the very question.

00:15:25,851 --> 00:15:27,588

Who made these kebabs?

00:15:27,588 --> 00:15:28,657

Why? You like them?

00:15:28,657 --> 00:15:29,559

No, they're terrible.

00:15:29,692 --> 00:15:31,963

But do you know who else

makes terrible kebabs?

00:15:31,963 --> 00:15:33,800

Ionia, where I'm from.

00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,604

I'm tasting this,

and I can tell

00:15:35,604 --> 00:15:36,973

you people are hard workers.

00:15:36,973 --> 00:15:38,610

It makes me wanna

throw you a bone.

00:15:38,610 --> 00:15:39,979

I tell you what.

00:15:39,979 --> 00:15:42,217

I never liked the Argonauts.

I found them rude.

00:15:42,217 --> 00:15:44,889

I didn't like the bits

they did about me being blind.

00:15:44,889 --> 00:15:46,826

So I'm gonna

cut you some slack.

00:15:46,826 --> 00:15:48,730

But you're

terrible storytellers.

00:15:48,730 --> 00:15:51,134

Your giant serpent was awful.

00:15:51,134 --> 00:15:54,408

I'm gonna tell you a story

that you can tell everybody.

00:15:54,408 --> 00:15:57,981

And if you ever stray from

our narrative, I swear to God,

00:15:57,981 --> 00:16:00,419

I will sink your city

with a stanza.

00:16:00,419 --> 00:16:02,725

- Yeah, all right.

- Sounds fair.

00:16:02,725 --> 00:16:05,597

What do you want us to say?

00:16:05,597 --> 00:16:06,700

My legs hurt.

00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:08,970

That's because you've never

really had to use them before.

00:16:08,970 --> 00:16:10,640

My back hurts.

00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:14,381

Ty, the red juice that comes

out of people sometimes...

00:16:14,381 --> 00:16:15,283

Blood?

00:16:15,283 --> 00:16:17,253

Is it bad

for the blood to come out?

00:16:17,253 --> 00:16:19,024

That's not

what kills you, is it?

00:16:19,024 --> 00:16:21,930

Mom, no! They got you!

What's happening?

00:16:21,930 --> 00:16:24,334

I think my life is

flashing before my eyes.

00:16:24,334 --> 00:16:26,071

Isn't that supposed

to be instantaneous?

00:16:26,071 --> 00:16:27,875

Well, there's a lot

more ground to cover

00:16:27,875 --> 00:16:29,144

when you're a god.

00:16:29,144 --> 00:16:31,048

How do you live this way?

00:16:31,048 --> 00:16:33,452

Always holding on

for dear life.

00:16:33,452 --> 00:16:35,957

Always begging

for borrowed time.

00:16:35,957 --> 00:16:37,995

I've never thought

about it that way.

00:16:37,995 --> 00:16:41,168

I suppose we do

hold on to each other.

00:16:41,268 --> 00:16:44,040

When you reach for someone

and they reach back,

00:16:44,140 --> 00:16:47,515

that feeling of connection

almost makes it bearable.

00:16:47,515 --> 00:16:51,288

I felt that once

on the day you were born.

00:16:51,288 --> 00:16:56,031

You were so small, so fragile,

so unlike your sister.

00:16:56,031 --> 00:16:57,602

You needed me.

00:16:57,602 --> 00:17:00,005

It was not for me.

00:17:00,005 --> 00:17:02,176

All right, Mom.

I'm gonna find the antidote.

00:17:02,176 --> 00:17:05,216

Meanwhile, you--

there's this thing humans do.

00:17:05,216 --> 00:17:08,255

It's called will to live,

where you're dying,

00:17:08,255 --> 00:17:11,061

and you can want

to not die so badly

00:17:11,061 --> 00:17:13,098

that you actually don't die.

00:17:13,098 --> 00:17:15,302

I'm realizing I'm not sure

it's an actual thing,

00:17:15,302 --> 00:17:17,407

or if it's a confirmation bias.

00:17:17,407 --> 00:17:18,911

Maybe even a smidge

of victim blaming

00:17:18,911 --> 00:17:20,179

when people do die, but--

00:17:20,279 --> 00:17:21,716

but it's worth a try.

00:17:21,716 --> 00:17:22,551

Oh, my God.

00:17:22,651 --> 00:17:25,056

Less talking,

more antidote getting.

00:17:25,056 --> 00:17:26,927

All right, yes.

Hang in there, Mom.

00:17:39,819 --> 00:17:41,322

Oh, there he is.

00:17:41,322 --> 00:17:43,458

Where's your mom?

- Dead, thanks to you.

00:17:43,458 --> 00:17:45,597

You're welcome.

Free at last.

00:17:45,597 --> 00:17:46,833

Come to join me?

00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:47,902

Oh, okay.

00:17:47,902 --> 00:17:49,505

Well, I'm not fighting you.

00:17:49,505 --> 00:17:51,509

Pitting us against each other

is only one of the ways

00:17:51,509 --> 00:17:54,180

the gods keep us down,

but those days are done.

00:17:54,180 --> 00:17:56,752

This baby is aimed right

at the heart of Mount Olympus.

00:17:56,752 --> 00:17:59,190

Every single god there

will have been breathing brotos

00:17:59,190 --> 00:18:01,328

by the time our army of

pissed off humans with knives

00:18:01,328 --> 00:18:03,099

gets up there

to finish the job.

00:18:03,099 --> 00:18:04,300

You're completely insane.

00:18:04,300 --> 00:18:06,037

We worship these maniacs

00:18:06,037 --> 00:18:07,407

who turn us

into goats and spiders

00:18:07,407 --> 00:18:08,476

because they're horny

and bored,

00:18:08,610 --> 00:18:11,214

but I'm the crazy one for

wanting to put a stop to it?

00:18:11,214 --> 00:18:13,118

The age of man

cannot truly begin

00:18:13,118 --> 00:18:14,420

until all the gods are dead.

00:18:14,420 --> 00:18:16,759

I don't care

about your ideology.

00:18:16,759 --> 00:18:18,095

Just give me the antidote.

00:18:18,095 --> 00:18:19,297

What, this antidote?

00:18:19,297 --> 00:18:20,600

Why would you need that?

00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:23,239

Unless someone's mother

isn't all the way dead.

00:18:23,239 --> 00:18:25,175

If you're not man enough

to finish the job,

00:18:25,175 --> 00:18:27,147

I guess I'll just have to

take care of it myself.

00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:29,284

No!

00:18:29,284 --> 00:18:31,622

It took us ages

to calibrate the Godkiller.

00:18:34,061 --> 00:18:35,731

Oh, yeah?

00:18:38,904 --> 00:18:40,774

No. No, no, no, no!

00:18:40,774 --> 00:18:41,910

Ah. No.

00:18:48,957 --> 00:18:50,192

You know they can

never be trusted.

00:18:50,192 --> 00:18:51,228

They're terrible.

00:18:51,228 --> 00:18:52,598

And there's only one solution.

00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:55,236

How do you not see that?

- That's the thing.

00:18:55,236 --> 00:18:57,407

Politically, I couldn't

be more aligned with you.

00:18:57,407 --> 00:19:00,046

That's why it's so frustrating

that you're such a dick.

00:19:00,046 --> 00:19:01,281

Dick.

00:19:01,281 --> 00:19:04,253

Mom? Mom, stay with me.

00:19:04,253 --> 00:19:06,258

Am I too late?

00:19:06,258 --> 00:19:08,295

I guess when two people

have hated each other

00:19:08,295 --> 00:19:10,266

for as long as we have,

00:19:10,266 --> 00:19:13,171

in some ways, it's the same

as love, isn't it?

00:19:13,171 --> 00:19:16,111

So I love you.

00:19:19,819 --> 00:19:22,725

I guess I kind of thought that

might bring you back somehow.

00:19:22,725 --> 00:19:26,364

Well, if that didn't work,

this must be real.

00:19:26,364 --> 00:19:28,102

I can't believe

this is how I ended up

00:19:28,102 --> 00:19:29,806

getting the last word.

00:19:29,806 --> 00:19:31,175

The hell you did.

00:19:31,175 --> 00:19:32,511

Mom? You're alive!

00:19:32,511 --> 00:19:34,615

Telling you I love you

did give you the will to live.

00:19:34,615 --> 00:19:36,953

Did you say that?

I didn't hear.

00:19:36,953 --> 00:19:38,790

All I heard was last words.

00:19:38,790 --> 00:19:39,725

Oh, come on.

00:19:39,859 --> 00:19:43,700

Now, let's blow this

kill box and go home.

00:19:47,674 --> 00:19:49,678

What happened

with the Argonauts?

00:19:49,678 --> 00:19:50,847

Did they show up?

00:19:50,847 --> 00:19:51,716

It was incredible.

00:19:51,816 --> 00:19:54,153

They had been cursed

by a giant serpent

00:19:54,153 --> 00:19:56,559

who turned them

against Homer himself.

00:19:56,559 --> 00:20:00,065

But no one knew what an

amazing swordsman Homer was.

00:20:00,065 --> 00:20:02,470

He sliced up

the mighty Argonauts

00:20:02,470 --> 00:20:04,875

with the strength

of an entire army.

00:20:04,875 --> 00:20:05,711

My goodness.

00:20:05,844 --> 00:20:07,748

Oh, and then having

broken the curse,

00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:10,319

the serpent blessed Homer

with a beautiful head

00:20:10,319 --> 00:20:11,722

of golden hair.

00:20:11,722 --> 00:20:14,828

The most beautiful hair

ever seen, which he now has.

00:20:14,828 --> 00:20:18,269

He complimented our kebabs and

sailed off for more adventure,

00:20:18,269 --> 00:20:20,608

looking sexy as hell.

00:20:20,608 --> 00:20:22,443

It's better than

anything I imagined.

00:20:22,443 --> 00:20:24,247

So did you get

everything you wanted

00:20:24,247 --> 00:20:25,784

out of your spa weekend?

00:20:25,784 --> 00:20:27,187

Do you feel renewed?

00:20:27,187 --> 00:20:29,759

Nah.

I nearly died of boredom.

00:20:29,759 --> 00:20:32,230

So obviously,

something happened.

00:20:32,230 --> 00:20:33,700

Well?

00:20:33,700 --> 00:20:37,173

You know, son, not everything

needs to be talked about.

00:20:37,173 --> 00:20:38,743

I couldn't agree more.

00:20:44,054 --> 00:20:46,457

And that is how I, Homer,

00:20:46,457 --> 00:20:49,431

inventor of the oral tradition,

slaughtered the Argonauts.

00:20:49,431 --> 00:20:52,203

Oh, Homer, you little pest.

00:20:52,303 --> 00:20:54,541

I always thought of you

as more of a voyeur.

00:20:54,541 --> 00:20:57,480

Now, how about a little bit

more of that oral tradition?

00:20:58,883 --> 00:20:59,919

What the hell was that?

00:21:01,455 --> 00:21:03,425

No, no, no!

00:21:05,463 --> 00:21:07,500

Sounds like

some sort of struggle.

00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,738

On Mount Olympus itself?

00:21:11,408 --> 00:21:12,945

What is the meaning of this?

00:21:12,945 --> 00:21:17,220

Heracles.

00:21:17,220 --> 00:21:21,729

This is for Jason,

Admetus, Acastus, Ancaus.

00:21:21,729 --> 00:21:24,134

I don't have to say

all these names.

00:21:26,471 --> 00:21:29,143

I hereby avenge

the Argonauts.

00:21:29,143 --> 00:21:30,814

Next quest.

00:21:30,980 --> 00:21:32,416

Did you get any of that?

00:21:34,956 --> 00:21:35,924

Bento.

00:00:07,410 --> 00:00:08,490

Это скелеты.

00:00:08,540 --> 00:00:11,250

Зачем сражаться со скелетами? Это как бить лежачих.

00:00:11,330 --> 00:00:14,000

Но ты сразился бы с армией лысых, скалящихся женщин?

00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,250

Если бы они первые начали.

00:00:15,290 --> 00:00:17,710

Ты их видел? Выглядят угрожающе.

00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:19,500

Потому что это скелеты, дорогой.

00:00:19,550 --> 00:00:21,010

Не знаю.

00:00:21,130 --> 00:00:23,550

При виде скелета я не думаю: сюда идут проблемы.

00:00:23,640 --> 00:00:27,350

Я думаю: сюда идёт кто-то, у кого были проблемы годы назад.

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Битвы аргонавтов всегда эпичные.

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Да. Я весь в предвкушении.

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Битва со скелетом. Как вообще понять, что она окончена?

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А они ведь зайдут сюда за припасами.

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Не сюда, а в ПрипАсию.

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Припасцы по сути изобрели припасы.

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Да, но они этим хвастались, так что Посейдон превратил в припасы их всех,

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и они использовали себя до смерти.

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А значит, аргонавты остановятся в Крапополисе.

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Нам есть чего опасаться?

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Мы всё-таки не величайшая угроза для человека, его же скелет.

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Ребята, с ними путешествует Гомер.

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Какой Гомер?

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Все места, где бывают аргонавты, упоминаются в поэме Гомера.

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Мы можем удостоиться упоминания.

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Желательно если это будет что-то туристическое вроде наших кебабов.

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Все знают, что наши кебабы отстой.

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В таком случае наши кебабы всемирно известны.

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Лучше бы помогла, Колосса.

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- Это сфера послания, не обращайте внимания.

- Сфера послания?

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Какого?..

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Да, она бьёт, пока не ответишь.

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Почему меня?!

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Всех по кругу. Игнорируйте ее. У нас семейное время.

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Ты можешь ей ответить?

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После второго удара не отвечают.

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Не хочу показаться отчаявшейся.

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Почему меня дважды?

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Ты проявил слабость.

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Ох, ладно.

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Делирия, надеюсь, у тебя всё хорошо.

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Я устраиваю очень особенный очень эксклюзивный отдых на своем острове и буду рада тебя там видеть.

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О, мамочке это нравится.

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Но возьми с собой своего смертного царя, Тягомота.

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Что? Мамочка не поняла.

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ГЕстия знает тебя?

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Да, очевидно. Она перепутала мое имя.

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Это розовато-голубая райская штука в центре трёх миров.

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Если увидите пирамиду, вернитесь чуть назад.

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Не надо Ти, звучит так, будто на этом острове боги охотятся на людей ради забавы.

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- Такое бывает?

- Не глупи.

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Мы же боги. Мы забавляемся по всему миру.

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Всё равно, я бы лучше остался здесь и встретил аргонавтов.

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Нет уж. Гестия никогда не рассылает приглашений. И она сказала взять тебя.

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- Она назвала меня тягомотом.

- И не ошиблась.

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Так ты будешь дуться как ребёнок или повзрослеешь и дашь отнести тебя на вечеринку?

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Ладно, но остальные приведите это место в приличный вид для Ясона и аргонавтов.

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- Приличный?

- Это еще как понимать?

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Ну, эти люди лучше, чем мы.

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- Чего?

- Извини меня?

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Если у вас есть энергия так оскорбляться, пустите ее на расчистку доков.

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Выведите рыбный запах.

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И не пререкайтесь, я ваш царь.

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Аргонавты должны хорошо провести время.

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Удачи тебе на охоте!

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Охоты не будет.

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Остров Гестии. Некоторые олимпийцы убили бы, чтобы попасть сюда.

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Я нечасто бывал на вечеринках, но эта выглядит слабовато.

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Это показывает, как мало ты понимаешь.

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Минуточку, Бросейдон здесь.

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Детка, ты сейчас серьёзно?

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Выбери что-нибудь.

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Я не уверена, что я хочу.

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Ну же. Хочешь меня опозорить?

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То ли Гестия уже не та, то ли память меня подводит.

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Что скажешь? Десять минут, пять?

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Просто покажемся Гестии и уйдём?

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Приветствую, пары смертных и бессмертных.

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Мы с моими любимым человеком устроим вам незабываемые выходные.

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Выходные, после которых вы почувствуете себя посвежевшими.

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Дорогие боги и богини, поднесите свои руки к ближайшему открытому пламени,

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и вы испытаете нечто удивительное.

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Я и так собирался.

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Оу! Это что, боль?!

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Она самая.

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Пыльца брОтоса, что растёт только на этом острове,

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обладает удивительным свойством лишать наш божественной силы.

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Вы дышали ей с момента прибытия.

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Ты нас отравила?

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Только не паникуйте.

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Это полезно для вас.

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Очищающе. Целебно.

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Это возможность освободиться из темницы вечности

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и достичь уровней близости и понимания, которых вы и представить не могли.

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Я уже понимаю всё. Мне не нужно понимать его.

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Ну, попытайся уйти, если хочешь.

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На ВитАлисе боги и люди равны.

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- Что?

- Что?

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Тога мы уплывём.

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Ты ведь умеешь грести?

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Вообще-то, мне вдруг захотелось остаться на все выходные.

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И нет, я не стану грести.

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Как брат мог сказать, что эти люди лучше нас?

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Мы окажем им хороший приём. Но прибираться-то зачем?

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Да, будто мы производим плохое впечатление.

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Что за глупости. Ти нужно расслабиться.

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Приветствую, славный народ...

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О боже, этот запах. Что это?

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Да ладно вам, не так он и плох.

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Не так и плох?

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Аргонавты, поплыли дальше.

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- Стойте.

- Нет!

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Подождите.

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Не трогай наши снасти.

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Снасти? Это швартовы.

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Мы зовём все канаты снастями. Ты что, полиция корабельных слов?

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- Отпусти.

- Останьтесь на наш знаменитый кебаб.

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Не приказывай мне, ты...

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Они все мертвы. По крайней мере это не войдёт в историю.

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Это Гомер?

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Эй, где аргонавты?

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Они уже ушли?

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Да.

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Сбегаешь?

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Ты настолько не готова дать равенству шанс?

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Не всё заслуживает шанса, Тиран.

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Мало что его заслуживает.

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Ты понимаешь, в чём дело? Гестия потеряла свою почему-то знаменитую девственность

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и теперь думает, что они с ее смертным парнем изобрели секс.

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Вижу, ты расстроена.

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Конечно, тебе это нравится.

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Я бессильна, твоя мечта сбылась.

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Я насладился этим одно чудесное мгновение.

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Но я правда думаю, что это хорошо.

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Новый способ взаимоотношений богов и смертных.

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У нас уже есть способ, работавший тысячи лет.

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Называется поклонение.

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Ну, это пойдёт тебе на пользу.

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И согласна ты со мной или нет, отказаться не получится.

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Ты могла бы приложить хоть немного усилий на этих выходных.

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Жди, затаив дыхание.

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А ты не затаивай дыхание надолго, а то умрёшь.

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Ну ты и тягомотина.

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Почему тебе всегда нужно оставлять последнее слово за тобой?

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Спроси через тысячу лет после твоей смерти.

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Не верится, что кто-то всё-таки участвует в этом фарсе.

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Их пленили и надругались над ними, а они и рады?

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Может, они не чувствую себя поруганными.

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Может, они находят это целебным, как и обещалось.

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Ох, это... как ты это назвала?

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- Небольшое несварение.

- Это невыносимо.

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И говоришь, так бывает время от времени?

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Детка, я понятия не имел, что можно так себя чувствовать.

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Отстойно быть тобой.

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О, Бросейдон.

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Видишь как мило?

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Да брось ты.

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Ясно же, что они над вами смеются.

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Над бессмысленностью ваших коротких, дурацких жизней.

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Начала понимать, в чём соль?

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Кажется, да.

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Так это всё насмешка над смертными?

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Я думал, мы должны быть равными.

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Извиняюсь, Гестия.

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Ты знаешь этих смертных.

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О нет, нет, нет.

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Всё в порядке.

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Но их легко взбудоражить, не так ли?

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Что еще здесь есть?

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Ой, всего и не перечислишь.

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Вымотался.

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Онемела рука.

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Прихватило живот.

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Наткнулась на статую, подумала, что к ней подкрались, и чувствует себя глупо.

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Знает, что люди говорят о нём, но не имеет возможности узнать, что именно.

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Это уже чересчур.

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Извини, что сомневалась в тебе.

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Это божественно.

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Он в своей комнате. Нам очень повезло, что Гомер слепой.

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Поистине, боги улыбаются нам. Он спрашивал об аргонавтах?

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Я не знала, что сказать, и сказала, что они устроили оргию между собой.

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Идеальное прикрытие.

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Эту дыру заткнули. И если верить слухам, все дыры были заткнуты.

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Что нам делать дальше?

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Когда он узнает, что случилось, мы докажем, что Ти был не просто прав, и мы не сделали того, что он хотел,

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а суперправ, потому что мы сделали противоположное тому, что он хотел.

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Это правда. Став злодеями в эпосе Гомера, мы едва ли привлечём к себе туристов.

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Гиппо, их можно вернуть к жизни?

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До этой технологии еще года три минимум.

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Чёрт. Мы попали.

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Стойте, давайте подумаем.

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Есть способ обернуть это нам на пользу.

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Что мы знаем о слепых?

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Они любят сидеть на земле.

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И обожают жестяные кружки.

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А еще?

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Они воспринимают всё оставшимися чувствами.

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Именно. За работу.

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Сюда, Гомер, старина.

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Аргонавты ждут.

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- Я чую кебабы.

- Да.

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Крапополис славится неимоверным количеством кебабов.

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И твои друзья не хотели начинать есть без тебя.

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О, не нужно было, ребята.

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Жестяную кружку?

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Налетаем, все вместе?

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Мм, мм, да.

00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,680

Ясон, как прошла оргия?

00:09:55,560 --> 00:09:56,510

Что это было?

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Наш гигантский змей.

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Он весь усеян мечами.

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Он ужасно опасен.

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Нам, аргонавтам, следовало бы с ним сразиться.

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- О да.

- Да.

00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:08,337

- Да.

- Да!

00:10:08,337 --> 00:10:10,200

- Да!

- Да!

00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:13,910

Звучит как не лучшая идея. Это животное опасно.

00:10:13,990 --> 00:10:16,080

Да, и он ни разу не проигрывал.

00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:19,410

Я много раз с ним дралась, и...

00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:21,500

не смогла победить.

00:10:22,790 --> 00:10:24,500

Мы должны с ним сразиться.

00:10:24,540 --> 00:10:25,840

Ты уверен?

00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:28,500

Его не так легко убить, как людские скелеты.

00:10:30,220 --> 00:10:34,220

Но вперёд, о храбрые уничтожители останков.

00:10:34,260 --> 00:10:34,930

Аргонавты!

00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:36,800

- Аргонавты!

- Аргонавты!

00:10:39,430 --> 00:10:40,850

Смертность.

00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:43,140

Теперь я ее понимаю, правда.

00:10:43,230 --> 00:10:45,190

Нет, не понимаешь. Знаешь, откуда я знаю?

00:10:45,230 --> 00:10:46,480

Ты этим наслаждаешься.

00:10:47,860 --> 00:10:50,990

Расслабься и веселись, как все остальные.

00:10:51,070 --> 00:10:53,570

Конечно, я не понимаю смертность.

00:10:53,660 --> 00:10:54,780

В этом вся шутка.

00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:57,490

Моя смертность временная.

00:10:57,540 --> 00:11:01,290

А альтернатива немыслима и оскорбительна.

00:11:01,370 --> 00:11:05,000

Ну уж извини, что моя смертность всегда была для тебя оскорбительной.

00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:07,250

Что это я слышу, извинения?

00:11:07,340 --> 00:11:10,090

Похоже, кое-кто делает успехи.

00:11:10,210 --> 00:11:13,260

Теперь можно начать укрепление доверия.

00:11:13,340 --> 00:11:17,140

Увидимся на мероприятии в конце вечера. Вы будете в восторге.

00:11:17,220 --> 00:11:21,640

Можно не ждать, что ты приложишь хоть немного усилий сегодня вечером?

00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:26,950

Идиотка.

00:11:27,030 --> 00:11:29,110

Проблемы с богами?

00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:30,950

Да. Как ты угадал?

00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:34,330

Меня зовут Тони, а Гестия зовёт меня человеком.

00:11:34,370 --> 00:11:37,160

Шутишь? Вот блин.

00:11:37,250 --> 00:11:39,420

И не говори. Но не нам их исправлять.

00:11:39,460 --> 00:11:41,340

Они не изменятся, но это нормально.

00:11:41,420 --> 00:11:44,170

Потому что мы их еще переживём.

00:11:44,260 --> 00:11:47,090

Да, точно. Боже мой.

00:11:47,130 --> 00:11:49,750

Так приятно слышать это от кого-то еще.

00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:53,100

И знаешь что? Гестия перепутала мое имя.

00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:56,980

Но что забавно, меня оскорбило то, как именно она его перепутала.

00:11:57,060 --> 00:11:59,600

Мне даже не нужно слышать всех подробностей.

00:11:59,650 --> 00:12:01,810

Мне это хорошо знакомо, поверь мне.

00:12:01,900 --> 00:12:03,230

Мы на одной волне, брат.

00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:05,690

Она назвала меня тягомотом.

00:12:05,780 --> 00:12:06,740

Что-о?

00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:23,540

В атаку!

00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:31,010

Со скелетами было просто.

00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:37,060

Так когда вы их убили? Как только они сошли с корабля?

00:12:37,140 --> 00:12:39,430

Ты всё это время знал?

00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:41,060

Ты переиграла, Колосса.

00:12:41,110 --> 00:12:43,310

- Выдала нас.

- Я жила моментом.

00:12:43,360 --> 00:12:45,070

Это был актёрский выбор.

00:12:45,190 --> 00:12:47,230

Вы думаете, я совсем дурак?

00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:52,030

Я просто хотел увидеть, как далеко вы зайдёте с вашей нелепой и проблематичной попыткой обдурить слепого.

00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:55,330

И отдам должное, вы зашли куда дальше, чем я считал возможным.

00:12:55,370 --> 00:12:58,830

Может, расскажешь историю о том, как крут наш звуковой дизайн?

00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:00,660

А?

00:13:00,750 --> 00:13:02,170

Нет?

00:13:11,340 --> 00:13:12,680

Рада, что ты завёл друга.

00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:14,680

- Закончил дуться?

- Ты...

00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:19,180

Друзья, добро пожаловать на церемонию закрытия.

00:13:19,310 --> 00:13:23,520

Чай в ваших руках очистит ваш организм от действия цветка.

00:13:23,650 --> 00:13:26,940

Выпейте его и снова станете богами.

00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:28,610

- Можно?

- Конечно.

00:13:28,610 --> 00:13:31,280

- Мой любимый человек.

- Спасибо.

00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:38,540

Друзья, люди, боги, вы только что своими глазами увидели мир, в котором боги и люди равны.

00:13:38,620 --> 00:13:42,250

А теперь я попрошу вас представить мир без богов.

00:13:45,250 --> 00:13:46,460

- Что?

- Дамы и господа.

00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:48,420

Противоядия сегодня не будет.

00:13:48,510 --> 00:13:50,960

Вы выпили горячую воду.

00:13:51,010 --> 00:13:52,800

Воду?

00:13:52,890 --> 00:13:55,680

Эпоха людей начнётся сегодня.

00:13:55,720 --> 00:13:57,010

Долой богов!

00:14:00,180 --> 00:14:01,680

Началось!

00:14:01,730 --> 00:14:02,810

Нет!

00:14:06,190 --> 00:14:08,230

Мне не нравится твой друг.

00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:15,160

Кажется, у меня приступ паники.

00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:16,780

Мама, я же уже объяснял.

00:14:16,870 --> 00:14:18,620

Это называется дыхание.

00:14:18,700 --> 00:14:21,200

Ах да. Мне это не нравится.

00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:23,540

Остановимся ненадолго. Вроде мы оторвались.

00:14:23,620 --> 00:14:24,960

Что там произошло?

00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,920

- Я не понимаю.

- Что непонятного?

00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:34,010

Твой друг воинственный экстремист. Он почему-то считает неправильным то, что люди подчиняются богам.

00:14:34,050 --> 00:14:39,680

Это абсурдная философия, и мое презрение к ней переходит все мыслимые и немыслимые пределы.

00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:40,850

Как ни удивительно.

00:14:40,930 --> 00:14:43,980

Я не уверен в ее абсурдности. С убийствами я не согласен, но...

00:14:44,060 --> 00:14:47,600

Ничтожествам, как правило, не нравится быть ничтожными, Тиран.

00:14:47,650 --> 00:14:51,150

Но большинству хватает ума даже не пытаться что-то делать.

00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:53,820

Революция это очень отчаянно.

00:14:53,900 --> 00:14:56,030

Мама, берегись.

00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:57,240

Как это работает?

00:14:57,320 --> 00:14:59,910

Если он меня коснётся, я умру?

00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:02,120

Или сколько требуется ударов?

00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:03,200

Просто не дай себя ударить.

00:15:03,290 --> 00:15:04,870

И одного может хватить?

00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:07,670

А важно как глубоко?

00:15:07,710 --> 00:15:09,080

О боже.

00:15:09,170 --> 00:15:10,880

Это было безумие.

00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,340

Бежим дальше?

00:15:12,380 --> 00:15:15,590

Да, да. Бежим дальше.

00:15:17,140 --> 00:15:18,550

Мы нашли тебе корабль.

00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:24,310

Но Гомер, мы можем как-нибудь убедить тебя не рассказывать всё в точности так, как это произошло?

00:15:24,350 --> 00:15:25,980

Меня оскорбляет этот вопрос.

00:15:26,060 --> 00:15:27,690

Кто готовил кебабы?

00:15:27,770 --> 00:15:28,560

Они тебе нравятся?

00:15:28,610 --> 00:15:29,690

Нет, они ужасны.

00:15:29,860 --> 00:15:32,100

Но знаете, где еще готовят ужасные кебабы?

00:15:32,110 --> 00:15:33,900

В иОнии, откуда я родом.

00:15:33,940 --> 00:15:37,070

По их вкусу чувствуется, что вы усердные труженики.

00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:40,120

Так что вот, я пойду вам навстречу.

00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:42,330

Эти грубияны аргонавты никогда мне не нравились.

00:15:42,370 --> 00:15:45,160

Они подшучивали над моей слепотой.

00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:46,910

Поэтому я не буду с вами строг.

00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:48,960

Но вы ужасные рассказчики.

00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,210

Ваш гигантский змей был из рук вон.

00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:54,500

Я расскажу вам историю, которую вы перескажете всем.

00:15:54,550 --> 00:16:00,510

И если вы отклонитесь от нашей версии, клянусь богам, я уничтожу ваш город в своих строфах.

00:16:00,550 --> 00:16:02,800

- Да, хорошо.

- Справедливо.

00:16:02,890 --> 00:16:05,350

Что мы должны сказать?

00:16:05,390 --> 00:16:06,730

Ноги болят.

00:16:06,980 --> 00:16:09,100

Потому что ты никогда ими не пользовалась.

00:16:09,190 --> 00:16:10,730

Спина болит.

00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:14,230

Ти, красный сок, который иногда течёт из людей...

00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:15,360

Кровь?

00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:17,400

Плохо, когда течёт кровь?

00:16:17,450 --> 00:16:19,110

Это ведь убивает, да?

00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,200

Мама, нет! В тебя попали! Что происходит?

00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:24,410

Жизнь пролетает у меня перед глазами.

00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:26,330

Это должно длиться мгновение.

00:16:26,410 --> 00:16:29,210

Ну, боги за свою жизнь повидали куда больше.

00:16:29,290 --> 00:16:31,080

Как можно так жить?

00:16:31,170 --> 00:16:33,540

Вечно держаться за свою жизнь.

00:16:33,550 --> 00:16:36,000

Вечно молиться, что у тебя есть время.

00:16:36,090 --> 00:16:38,130

Я никогда об этом не задумывался.

00:16:38,180 --> 00:16:41,180

Мы держимся друг за друга.

00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:44,100

Когда мы тянемся к кому-то, а они тянутся в ответ,

00:16:44,220 --> 00:16:47,560

это чувство связи делает жизнь почти выносимой.

00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:51,350

Я ощутила это однажды, в день твоего рождения.

00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:56,070

Ты был таким маленьким и хрупким, таким непохожим на сестру.

00:16:56,110 --> 00:16:57,650

Ты нуждался во мне.

00:16:57,690 --> 00:17:00,030

Это было не для меня.

00:17:00,110 --> 00:17:02,200

Ладно, мам, я найду противоядие.

00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:07,422

А ты пока... У людей есть такая штука, называется воля к жизни.

00:17:07,422 --> 00:17:13,080

Это когда ты умираешь, но тебе так сильно не хочется умирать, что ты этого не делаешь.

00:17:13,170 --> 00:17:17,420

Я сейчас понял, что я не уверен, правда ли это или мне только так казалось.

00:17:17,510 --> 00:17:20,170

В этом есть немного перекладывания вины на тех, кто таки умирает.

00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:21,470

Но попытаться стоит.

00:17:21,550 --> 00:17:22,510

О боже.

00:17:22,680 --> 00:17:25,050

Хватит болтать, давай за противоядием.

00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:27,010

Верно, да. Держись, мама.

00:17:39,820 --> 00:17:41,320

А вот и он.

00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,490

- Где твоя мама?

- Мертва благодаря тебе.

00:17:43,530 --> 00:17:45,570

Радуйся, ты наконец свободен.

00:17:45,660 --> 00:17:47,910

Присоединишься? Ладно.

00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:49,490

Я не стану драться.

00:17:49,540 --> 00:17:54,170

Стравливать нас было одним из способов, которым боги принижали нас, но эти дни позади.

00:17:54,210 --> 00:17:56,710

Эта малышка нацелена прямо в сердце Олимпа.

00:17:56,800 --> 00:18:03,050

Все боги надышатся бротосом к тому моменту, когда наша армия разгневанных людей с ножами поднимется туда закончить начатое.

00:18:03,140 --> 00:18:04,260

Ты полный безумец.

00:18:04,340 --> 00:18:08,640

Мы поклоняемся маньякам, которые превращают нас в козлов и пауков из похоти и скуки,

00:18:08,810 --> 00:18:11,140

а я безумец, потому что хочу с этим покончить?

00:18:11,230 --> 00:18:14,350

Эпоха людей не начнётся, пока все боги не умрут.

00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:16,690

Мне плевать на твою идеологию.

00:18:16,770 --> 00:18:18,020

Дай мне противоядие.

00:18:18,110 --> 00:18:20,650

Это противоядие? Зачем оно тебе?

00:18:20,740 --> 00:18:23,200

Или чья-то мать не так уж и мертва?

00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:27,120

Если тебе не хватает мужества, мне придётся покончить с ней самому.

00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:31,540

Нет! Мы целую вечность нацеливали убийцу богов.

00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:35,670

Вот как?

00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:40,710

Нет. Нет, нет, нет, нет!

00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:41,840

Нет!

00:18:49,310 --> 00:18:51,440

Им нельзя доверять, они ужасны.

00:18:51,530 --> 00:18:55,440

- И есть лишь одно решение. Как ты не понимаешь?

- Вот в чём дело.

00:18:55,530 --> 00:18:57,740

Я полностью согласен с твоей точкой зрения.

00:18:57,780 --> 00:19:01,530

Поэтому очень досадно, что ты такой мудак. Мудак.

00:19:01,580 --> 00:19:04,450

Мама? Мама, не покидай меня.

00:19:04,500 --> 00:19:06,500

Я опоздал?

00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:10,630

Когда двое людей ненавидят друг друга так долго, как мы,

00:19:10,670 --> 00:19:13,380

в каком-то смысле это то же, что и любовь.

00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:16,300

Так что я люблю тебя.

00:19:20,050 --> 00:19:22,890

Я почему-то думал, что это вернёт тебя к жизни.

00:19:22,930 --> 00:19:26,720

Но если это не сработало, то ты правда мертва.

00:19:26,810 --> 00:19:30,020

Не думал, что вот так последнее слово останется за мной.

00:19:30,110 --> 00:19:31,310

Ни черта.

00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:32,690

Мама? Ты жива!

00:19:32,770 --> 00:19:34,900

Мои слова о любви дали тебе волю к жизни.

00:19:34,990 --> 00:19:37,110

Ты такое говорил? Я не слышала.

00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,700

Я услышала лишь последние слова.

00:19:38,780 --> 00:19:39,860

Да ё моё.

00:19:40,030 --> 00:19:43,870

А теперь полетели отсюда домой.

00:19:47,910 --> 00:19:50,920

Что там было с аргонавтами? Они приплывали?

00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,000

Это было невероятно.

00:19:52,130 --> 00:19:56,670

Их проклял гигантский змей, и они обратились против самого Гомера.

00:19:56,760 --> 00:20:00,220

Но никто не знал, какой Гомер удивительный мечник.

00:20:00,260 --> 00:20:04,800

Он искромсал могучих аргонавтов. Он был силён, как целая армия.

00:20:04,850 --> 00:20:05,850

Ничего себе.

00:20:06,020 --> 00:20:11,106

А затем, после снятия проклятия, змей даровал Гомеру прекрасные золотые волосы.

00:20:11,106 --> 00:20:15,010

Никто не видел волос прекрасней, чем теперь есть у Гомера.

00:20:15,070 --> 00:20:20,740

Он похвалил наши кебабы и уплыл навстречу новым приключениям, выглядя чертовски сексуально.

00:20:20,780 --> 00:20:22,570

Даже лучше, чем я мог представить.

00:20:22,660 --> 00:20:27,330

А вы получили всё, что хотели, от своих выходных? Чувствуете себя посвежевшими?

00:20:27,410 --> 00:20:29,870

Не. Я чуть не умерла от скуки.

00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:32,290

То есть явно что-то произошло.

00:20:32,330 --> 00:20:33,790

Ну?

00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:37,300

Знаешь, сын, не обо всём нужно говорить.

00:20:37,380 --> 00:20:38,880

Полностью согласна.

00:20:44,180 --> 00:20:49,520

Вот так я, Гомер, изобретатель устной традиции, сразил аргонавтов.

00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,270

О, Гомер, маленький негодник.

00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:54,650

Я всегда думал, что ты больше любишь наблюдать.

00:20:54,690 --> 00:20:57,570

Как насчёт продолжения устной традиции?

00:20:59,030 --> 00:20:59,980

Что это было?

00:21:01,660 --> 00:21:03,490

Нет, нет, нет!

00:21:05,740 --> 00:21:07,580

Кажется, там идёт борьба.

00:21:07,660 --> 00:21:09,830

На горе Олимп?

00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:13,040

Как это понимать?

00:21:14,169 --> 00:21:17,340

Геракл.

00:21:17,380 --> 00:21:21,920

Это за Ясона, адмЕта, акАста, анкЕя.

00:21:21,970 --> 00:21:24,220

Не буду перечислять их всех.

00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:29,180

Я отомстил за аргонавтов.

00:21:29,220 --> 00:21:30,850

Следующий подвиг.