Кризис оливкового масла

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- Сюда!

- Помогите!

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Я делаю всё, что могу.

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Хватайся за ветку - и я тебя вытащу.

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И отпустить воду?

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Это верная смерть!

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Что происходит?

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Много чего.

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Саранча жрёт наш урожай.

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Могильщик умер и просто сидел там.

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В сырной пещере нашествие летучих мышей.

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Огнедышащие орки вернулись.

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И мост рухнул.

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Я был так занят вопросом,

смогу ли я построить

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мост из грязи,

что забыл подумать, а стоит ли.

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Хватит раскисать, Саймон.

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Разберёмся в причинах позже.

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Похоже, ты готов свалить всё на него!

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Разве это не твоя ответственность?

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Я пытаюсь спасти тебя.

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Спасти меня?

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Или свою драгоценную репутацию?

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Так, что у нас тут? Мост обрушился?

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Мне нужна верёвка, собака-спасатель,

купальный костюм и что-то, что не тонет.

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И Гиппо, тот чай,

который ты варишь из кофейных зёрен.

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Сейчас.

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Колосса, бросай все дела.

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Нет, мама.

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Не забирай ее сейчас.

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Она спасает жизни.

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Неверно, она меняет дату их смерти.

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У меня кое-что намного более важное.

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Мама, нет.

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Не превращай меня в... Кря!

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Что может быть важнее и при этом

требовать ее превращения в гусыню?

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Когда Афина получает новый храм,

мы с Колоссой становимся

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гусынями,

чтобы слетать туда и нагадить на него.

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Это весёлый способ стать ближе

с моим любимым ребёнком.

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Отличная совершенно лишняя издёвка.

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Кто-то может помочь?

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Кто угодно?

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Папа, хорошо, что ты здесь.

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Ты это видишь?

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Видишь, что здесь оливкового масла?

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Во что мне макать хлеб?

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Боже, помоги.

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Спасибо, да, мне нужна помощь.

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Папа, верёвку!

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Ты доволен? Ты мог ее спасти.

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Откуда знать, может, теперь она

живёт счастливо ниже по течению.

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Если буду нужен, я в баре.

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Ты мне нужен.

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И я буду в баре.

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Ладно, одна курица для тебя.

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Стандартная выплата за потерю близкого.

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Подожди, ты не теряла близких.

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Так я не заслуживаю курицу?

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Сын, на пару слов.

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В чём дело?

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Вернёмся к оливковому маслу.

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Папа, я невероятно занят.

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Я знаю, что для тебя это чуждая концепция,

но я сейчас разбираюсь

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с миллионом кризисом и оливковое

масло далеко не в начале списка.

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Да, но люди любят оливковое масло.

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Должен тебя предупредить,

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народ в баре сейчас не то чтобы

сочиняет песни о любви к тебе.

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О, бар.

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Да, конечно, ты по этому эксперт.

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Не совсем эксперт.

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Скорее любитель.

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Но почему бы не пойти им навстречу?

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Это всего лишь масло.

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Ради него нужно работать. Как и ради всего.

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Мой опыт говорит о другом.

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Конечно, потому что я выполняю всю работу.

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Такое отношение играет

свою роль в твоей популярности.

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Я непопуля... Так, знаешь что, папа?

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Хочешь оливкового масла? Ты этим и займись.

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Завтра торговая встреча.

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Поручаю ее тебе.

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Я люблю иногда пробовать что-то новое.

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С радостью.

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Было странно поручать папе оливковое масло.

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Я понимаю, что это не в приоритете,

но я хочу оливкового масла.

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Конечно, все его хотят.

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Я тоже хочу.

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Но либо папа справится - и тогда отлично,

масло будет.

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Либо нет, и будем честны, именно так и

случится. И тогда мы ничего не потеряем.

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А ему придётся признать,

что ради всего нужно работать.

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Надо же, отдам тебе должное, братан.

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Хороший ход.

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Спасибо.

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Знаешь, что это? Беспроигрышная ставка.

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Беспроигрышная.

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Мне это нравится.

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- Ты сейчас это придумал?

- Да.

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То есть не прямо сейчас.

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Я это обдумывал.

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Идеальный расклад, идеальный баланс.

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На какую бы сторону мы ни поставили,

мы в выигрыше.

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Кто бы ни выиграл, мы выиграем.

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Так и так выигрыш.

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Я сказал, что уже обдумал это.

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Ты съела достаточно ягод?

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Нужно обгадить много храмов Афины,

тебя должно хватить на все.

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Да, мама, я съела достаточно.

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Прекрати сводить всю мою

жизнь к еде в моем животе.

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Брось, тебе это нравится.

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Нет, не нравится. У меня были дела.

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Ты моя дочь, а значит, ты работаешь на меня.

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Камень, камень, камень, камень?

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Камень, камень?

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О чём они говорят?

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Мама!

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Ты в порядке?

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- Нет, нет!

- Уйди!

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Почему ты его не долбанула?

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Для тебя это какая-то игра?

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Долбануть?

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Да, почему не долбанула его и не стала собой?

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Собой?

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Это и есть я.

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Хватит шутить, мама.

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Я не понимаю, о чём ты говоришь.

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Ну и ну, ты правда считаешь, что ты гусыня?

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А кто же еще?

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Ладно, проверим.

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Если я скажу, что Делирия слабая

маленькая вонючая задница, которая

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командует людьми из-за

неуверенности в себе, что ты ответишь?

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Что такое Делирия?

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- Вот чёрт.

- Они здесь!

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Хороший мальчик.

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Летим, летим, летим, летим.

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О, до-доброе утро, КОлакс.

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Ты давно здесь стоишь или?..

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Я с ежедневными катастрофами,

ваше высочество. Хотите услышать?

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А, да, хорошо.

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Воронка породила вторую воронку.

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И склад зерна теперь склад гнилого зерна.

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Да, да, да, да. Но начнём с оливкового масла.

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Сперва давай десерт.

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Это единственное, с чем всё нормально.

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Извини, нормально? То есть...

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Всё идёт гладко с тех пор,

как за него отвечает ваш отец.

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И это так меня злит.

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И за такое, мой друг,

тебя выгонят из ГомОрры.

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Что это? Что произошло?

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Сын, хочешь оливкового масла?

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У нас его много.

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Как ты добыл оливковое масло?

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Это очень сложно.

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То есть не всегда сложно.

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Зачастую это легко, но как ты это сделал?

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Я пропустил торговую встречу,

на которую ты меня отправил.

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Поэтому я пришёл сюда

выпить и встретил этого

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уродливого сукина сына,

у которого масла хоть завались.

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Этот парень!

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Вождь каннибалов, который хочет нас съест.

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Не смотри на то, что я каннибал,

и ты увидишь, что я человек,

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который ест людей с оливковым маслом,

которым я делюсь.

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Ну, теперь всё понятно.

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Это метод Шлаба:

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случайно оказаться в ситуации,

в которой тебе просто дают нужное.

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Если случайно означает "поладить с людьми,

чтобы понравиться им, и они захотели помочь".

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Да, чего придираешься к Шлабу?

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Позволь заметить,

из-за этой привычки указывать

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людям что делать ты им и не нравишься.

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- Я им нравлюсь.

- Ну-у...

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Заткнись, МИриам. У тебя свои причины.

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И ты положила курицу в детскую коляску?

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И что с того?

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Кого вообще волнует,

что нравится жителям города?

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Да уж.

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Вам нравится только бездельничать в баре.

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Но для этого кто-то должен работать.

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Пока вы не делаете этого добровольно,

вам нужно указывать, что делать.

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И если это непопулярно, то возможно,

популярность сама по себе проблема.

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Что я хочу сказать?

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Это слово прямо на

языке верти... Ах да. Бу-у-у!

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Проваливай отсюда, козлина.

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Да, вали отсюда.

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Мы ненавидим тебя!

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Отлично сработано с маслом, Шлаб.

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Да!

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Дружище, Шлаб.

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Похоже, всё-таки не беспроигрышная.

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Нет, беспроигрышная.

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Просто один из выигрышей оказался

не таким выигрышным, как другой.

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Всё страдаешь из-за того,

что тебя вышвырнули?

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Меня не вышвыривали.

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Не физически.

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Меня не поднимали и не бросали.

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Меня прогнали.

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Мои ноги не отрывались от земли.

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То есть отрывались, но всего на мгновение.

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Если честно, я очень желал папе провала.

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Знаю.

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Было бы шикарно!

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Он идёт по жизни, напиваясь и рассказывая

дурацкие истории, и получает всё просто так.

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А таких как мы, кто выполняет всю работу,

смешивают с дерьмом.

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Спасибо.

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Видимо, с этим нужно смириться.

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Не обязательно.

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Что если заставлять других

работать за тебя - это правильно.

00:08:11,310 --> 00:08:15,850

Взгляни на маму. У нее вся власть в

отношениях, и она ничего не делает.

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Что если в этом секрет?

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Пап, повторюсь, отлично сработано с маслом.

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Что ж, это было весело.

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Так что не назвал бы это работой.

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Да.

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Мы тут подумали, может,

возьмёшь на себя больше обязанностей?

00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:32,374

Если обязанности и дальше будут не более

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требовательными,

чем их отсутствие, я буду только рад.

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Чего вы хотели?

00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:39,330

Ну, начнём с воронок.

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И продуктов.

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Как ты видишь, инжир не первой свежести.

00:08:44,310 --> 00:08:48,550

По-прежнему остаются нашествие

летучих мышей и огнедышащие орки.

00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:50,220

Мои овцы!

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И любые другие конфликты, нехватка чего-либо

и смерти, которых можно было избежать.

00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:58,309

Народ, отныне воронкой, продуктами,

нашествием летучих мышей и

00:08:58,314 --> 00:09:02,310

орками будет заниматься чрезвычайно

компетентный и способный Шлаб.

00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:05,690

Назови полное имя для официальности.

00:09:05,750 --> 00:09:08,020

ШлАбрик Майкл.

00:09:08,060 --> 00:09:09,590

Это шутка, да?

00:09:09,660 --> 00:09:10,900

Глянусь богом.

00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:18,380

Шлабрик Майкл... наш новый главный по

воронкам, продуктам, летучим мышам и оркам.

00:09:21,220 --> 00:09:22,920

Ты же понял, что он обрекает тебя на неудачу?

00:09:22,990 --> 00:09:23,960

Тиран?

00:09:24,060 --> 00:09:25,460

Он бы не стал.

00:09:25,490 --> 00:09:28,030

Он не совсем с тобой честен.

00:09:28,100 --> 00:09:31,200

Ти хочет, чтобы ты поел дерьма,

что не к лицу для царя.

00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:33,980

Возможно, он получит то, что хочет.

00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:36,450

Я не собираюсь заполнять воронку.

00:09:36,510 --> 00:09:37,220

Кто хочет выпить?

00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:39,650

- За провал!

- За провал!

00:09:39,750 --> 00:09:40,890

Нет, знаете что?

00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:43,390

Если твой провал станет его победой,

я этого не допущу.

00:09:43,490 --> 00:09:46,730

Плюс ты отличный мужик,

я не прочь для тебя покопать.

00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:47,940

Я заполню воронку.

00:09:47,940 --> 00:09:48,940

Я тоже помогу.

00:09:48,940 --> 00:09:49,910

Да, и я.

00:09:49,940 --> 00:09:50,910

Ради Шлаба.

00:09:50,940 --> 00:09:52,850

Ради Шлаба!

00:09:52,910 --> 00:09:55,959

Так ты не помнишь, как когда мне

было три тебе надоело ждать, пока

00:09:55,964 --> 00:09:58,790

я вырасту, и ты оставила меня на

воспитание огненным муравьям?

00:09:58,830 --> 00:10:00,060

Нет.

00:10:00,090 --> 00:10:02,800

Не помнишь,

как предлагала меня ГЕстии за ожерелье?

00:10:02,830 --> 00:10:04,900

Звучит не очень хорошо.

00:10:04,940 --> 00:10:07,110

Не помнишь, как бросила меня в медведя?

00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:08,640

Ты это выдумываешь.

00:10:08,710 --> 00:10:11,550

Мама, я попробую встряхнуть твою память.

00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:12,620

Не злись.

00:10:15,060 --> 00:10:16,560

Зачем ты это сделала?

00:10:16,630 --> 00:10:17,630

Шансы были.

00:10:17,730 --> 00:10:20,670

А может, ты сможешь долбануть, не вспоминая.

00:10:20,740 --> 00:10:21,740

Попробуй.

00:10:21,770 --> 00:10:23,570

Бах, бах.

00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:24,540

Давай, соберись.

00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:27,750

Думай о том, о чём думаешь,

когда знаешь, что ты богиня.

00:10:27,820 --> 00:10:28,990

Бах.

00:10:28,990 --> 00:10:30,760

Ты всё повторяешь слово "богиня".

00:10:30,820 --> 00:10:31,830

Да, это ты.

00:10:31,890 --> 00:10:33,230

Я не знаю, что это.

00:10:33,260 --> 00:10:34,700

Но знаю, что такое мать.

00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:38,000

Мать любящая, добрая и заботится о детях.

00:10:38,070 --> 00:10:40,040

В каком мире это правда?

00:10:40,110 --> 00:10:44,817

Уверена, если бы я вспомнила твое детство,

я бы вспомнила, как согревала тебя по ночам,

00:10:44,822 --> 00:10:49,160

кормила, учила летать, защищала от

опасностей. Потому что именно это делает мать.

00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,200

Да, мать-гусыня.

00:10:51,260 --> 00:10:55,050

Хм, ну а что, почему бы и нет?

00:10:55,050 --> 00:10:59,133

Лет пять поживу с хорошей мамой,

а затем нас убьют и съедят.

00:10:59,650 --> 00:11:00,410

Тоже неплохо.

00:11:00,510 --> 00:11:03,690

Садись, я совью тебе гнездо.

00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,870

Мне будет нисколько не стыдно,

когда папа потерпит неудачу.

00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:10,940

Ему нужен был этот урок.

00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:12,440

Безусловно.

00:11:12,510 --> 00:11:16,380

Это и есть та самая беспроигрышная

ситуация, о которой я тебе говорил.

00:11:16,450 --> 00:11:18,780

Погоди, воронка заполнена.

00:11:18,820 --> 00:11:20,660

Летучих мышей и орков нет.

00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:21,760

Инжир?

00:11:23,260 --> 00:11:26,979

Я так набухался,

что врезался прямо в огромную

00:11:26,984 --> 00:11:30,470

статую финкса и отломал

пенис у нее на лице.

00:11:32,910 --> 00:11:34,650

О-о, начальник здесь.

00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:35,920

Все делаем вид, что заняты.

00:11:37,090 --> 00:11:38,220

А вот и ты, сынок.

00:11:38,260 --> 00:11:40,730

Хорошие новости. Всё улажено.

00:11:40,830 --> 00:11:42,530

Воронка, орки, мыши.

00:11:42,630 --> 00:11:44,940

- Я даже не просил.

- Ему не нужно было.

00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,240

Он нам нравится.

00:11:46,310 --> 00:11:49,980

И этот старый козолюб

гарантирует нам сто лет мира.

00:11:50,010 --> 00:11:51,120

Сам ты козолюб.

00:11:51,180 --> 00:11:52,650

Это не по любви.

00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:55,690

Стоп.

00:11:55,860 --> 00:11:58,400

Так все просто так рвали задницы ради папы?

00:11:58,460 --> 00:12:01,040

Но когда я вас о чём-то прошу, я плохой?

00:12:01,070 --> 00:12:02,140

Ты нам не нравишься.

00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:03,310

Любой может как он.

00:12:03,370 --> 00:12:05,210

Он пьёт и оскорбляет людей.

00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:06,950

Эй, носатый, как поживаешь?

00:12:07,020 --> 00:12:08,550

А вот идёт вонючий пёс.

00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:11,560

А там чокнутая куриная

мамаша с ее малышкой курицей.

00:12:11,590 --> 00:12:12,490

Это уже за гранью.

00:12:12,660 --> 00:12:15,360

Я делаю то же, что и он. Просто шучу.

00:12:15,430 --> 00:12:17,570

Это ни черта не похоже на шутки.

00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:19,910

Мой тупой отец всё время так делает.

00:12:19,970 --> 00:12:21,210

Ты оскорбляешь моего друга?

00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:24,450

Вы вообще не друзья. Он тебе нравится,

только когда ты пьян.

00:12:24,480 --> 00:12:29,030

Теперь у тебя претензии к

нашему пьянству? Ты хуже всех.

00:12:29,090 --> 00:12:30,530

Я скажу, что я вижу.

00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:34,000

Я вижу, что когда за главного Шлаб,

город управляется гораздо лучше.

00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,270

Я падаю вверх.

00:12:35,340 --> 00:12:39,880

А я вижу толпу людей,

которых пьяница заставил работать за них.

00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:45,420

Не нужно меня вышвыривать.

00:12:45,490 --> 00:12:48,160

Я сам уйду. Я пошёл.

00:12:57,280 --> 00:13:00,350

Мам, вспомним былое?

00:13:11,810 --> 00:13:12,910

Храм Афины.

00:13:12,950 --> 00:13:13,980

Афина?

00:13:14,050 --> 00:13:15,150

Звучит знакомо.

00:13:15,220 --> 00:13:16,150

Нет, неважно.

00:13:16,190 --> 00:13:17,260

Забудь об этом.

00:13:17,290 --> 00:13:19,190

Это просто глупое слово.

00:13:19,260 --> 00:13:21,600

Мы летели туда. Но зачем?

00:13:21,630 --> 00:13:23,370

Без причины. Нам пора переселиться.

00:13:23,430 --> 00:13:24,540

Там озеро получше.

00:13:24,570 --> 00:13:26,870

- Полетели.

- Стой, я помню.

00:13:26,940 --> 00:13:28,810

Нет, не вспоминай сейчас.

00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:29,980

Вспомни потом.

00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:31,920

Останься глупой еще немного.

00:13:31,980 --> 00:13:35,760

Я Делирия, богиня.

00:13:35,830 --> 00:13:36,690

Чёрт.

00:13:36,790 --> 00:13:38,500

И ты не хотела, чтобы я вспоминала.

00:13:38,560 --> 00:13:40,200

Ты хотела утаить это от меня.

00:13:40,270 --> 00:13:42,140

Всего на пару дней или лет.

00:13:42,210 --> 00:13:44,410

Жизнь гусыни - сущий ад.

00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:47,050

Я переживаю за тебя, обожаю тебя.

00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:48,950

Я свила тебе гнездо.

00:13:48,990 --> 00:13:50,220

Это называется быть матерью.

00:13:50,290 --> 00:13:51,820

Это называется мучение.

00:13:51,890 --> 00:13:56,330

Безусловная любовь? Чувство, что я

скорее умру, чем позволю тебе навредить?

00:13:56,430 --> 00:13:58,810

Я этого худшему врагу не пожелаю.

00:13:58,840 --> 00:13:59,970

Ты преувеличиваешь.

00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:01,780

Имею на это право.

00:14:01,810 --> 00:14:03,380

Истинный облик.

00:14:04,980 --> 00:14:06,820

Истинный облик.

00:14:06,850 --> 00:14:07,920

Истинный облик!

00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:15,720

Покажите мне женщин, зверей и мужчин.

00:14:15,750 --> 00:14:20,630

А я вам покажу возбуждающий пир.

00:14:20,700 --> 00:14:24,510

А я тут думал,

откроется ли у меня пятое дыхание.

00:14:24,540 --> 00:14:25,870

Мы потолковали.

00:14:25,940 --> 00:14:29,120

Ты самая горячая тема в

Крапоплисе после оливкового масла.

00:14:29,180 --> 00:14:31,250

Оно восхитительно. Горячее и холодное.

00:14:31,290 --> 00:14:32,460

Перейду прямо к делу.

00:14:32,490 --> 00:14:33,490

Мы захватим замок.

00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,060

Что мы сделаем?

00:14:35,130 --> 00:14:36,300

У Тирана был шанс.

00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,800

Люди хотят новое руководство.

00:14:38,870 --> 00:14:41,270

Моя армия в твоем распоряжении, царь Шлаб.

00:14:41,340 --> 00:14:42,380

Если хочешь.

00:14:42,410 --> 00:14:43,410

Что скажешь?

00:14:43,510 --> 00:14:44,550

Что скажу?

00:14:44,610 --> 00:14:45,710

Вы все свихнулись.

00:14:45,780 --> 00:14:47,790

Речь идёт о моем сыне.

00:14:47,820 --> 00:14:50,060

Твой сын хотел твоего провала.

00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:51,460

И это было весело.

00:14:51,530 --> 00:14:52,930

На районе всё путём.

00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:57,170

Подождите, мне начинает казаться,

что вы хотите, чтобы я был главным.

00:14:57,270 --> 00:14:58,740

Хотим!

00:14:58,810 --> 00:15:00,480

Возникло недопонимание.

00:15:00,540 --> 00:15:01,710

Я не хочу быть царём.

00:15:01,780 --> 00:15:03,280

И вы этого не хотите.

00:15:03,350 --> 00:15:04,390

Ты говоришь мне, чего я хочу?

00:15:06,420 --> 00:15:07,690

Я понял, что происходит.

00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:12,516

Ваши тёплые чувства ко мне связаны

не столько с тем, что я собой представляю,

00:15:12,510 --> 00:15:15,212

сколько с вами самими, а именно, с вашим

00:15:15,217 --> 00:15:18,466

неприятием человека,

который указывает вам, что делать.

00:15:18,650 --> 00:15:23,136

Но я олицетворяю ничегонеделание,

я ни за что не стою, а значит,

00:15:23,141 --> 00:15:27,900

я предпочёл бы, чтобы Тиран занимался

своим делом, а вы занимались своим.

00:15:27,970 --> 00:15:32,280

Я понимаю, вы хотите увидеть,

как царь падёт. Но у нас всех есть выбор.

00:15:32,310 --> 00:15:33,710

Вы против контроля?

00:15:33,740 --> 00:15:36,750

В таком случае забудьте

об этой чуши и пейте дальше.

00:15:36,820 --> 00:15:42,330

Или вы всё-таки выберете конфликт,

остроту возмездия и постоянно кризиса?

00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:43,560

Постоянный кризис!

00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,070

Идём на замок!

00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,260

Ты это слышишь? Они штурмуют дворец.

00:15:59,330 --> 00:16:00,560

Они штурмуют дворец.

00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:01,800

Спасибо, КОлакс.

00:16:01,830 --> 00:16:05,610

Ты должен быть в первых рядах, защищать

меня, а не говорить то, что я и так знаю.

00:16:05,670 --> 00:16:09,520

Я думаю, я служу важной цели здесь,

как ваш доверенный новостник.

00:16:09,550 --> 00:16:11,350

Вы это видели?

00:16:11,420 --> 00:16:12,860

Они требуют вашу голову.

00:16:12,890 --> 00:16:14,990

Иди.

00:16:15,060 --> 00:16:16,000

Молодец, папа.

00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,600

Судя по тону ты считаешь это моей виной.

00:16:18,670 --> 00:16:20,510

Это твоя вина. Ты их подтолкнул.

00:16:20,540 --> 00:16:21,670

Ничего не делая?

00:16:21,740 --> 00:16:22,910

Да.

00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:25,880

Ну, через пару минут они ворвутся сюда,

обезглавят тебя

00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:28,620

и сделают меня царём,

что будет плохо для нас обоих.

00:16:28,650 --> 00:16:30,620

Так что мы в одной лодке.

00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:32,060

Ты должен был облажаться.

00:16:32,130 --> 00:16:33,660

Ну извини, что подвёл.

00:16:33,730 --> 00:16:37,340

Я тоже хотел бы бездельничать,

как ты, но я не могу.

00:16:37,410 --> 00:16:38,540

И я завидую.

00:16:38,610 --> 00:16:40,480

У меня нет того, что есть у тебя.

00:16:40,540 --> 00:16:42,980

Зато есть то, чего у меня нет. Ты был прав.

00:16:43,020 --> 00:16:46,620

Мне сходит с рук безделье

только благодаря таким как ты.

00:16:46,690 --> 00:16:48,190

Ну, кто-то же должен.

00:16:48,260 --> 00:16:49,400

Кто-то должен был главным.

00:16:49,430 --> 00:16:50,700

Согласен.

00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:55,410

Нужен кто-то, на кого они кричат, на кого

жалуются, над чьей плоской задницей смеются.

00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:56,740

Что они делают?

00:16:56,810 --> 00:16:58,250

Сейчас не до твоей задницы.

00:16:58,280 --> 00:16:59,550

Они штурмуют замок.

00:16:59,580 --> 00:17:02,420

В общем, им всегда нужно кого-то не любить.

00:17:02,460 --> 00:17:03,590

Это из забава.

00:17:03,620 --> 00:17:04,830

Точно.

00:17:04,860 --> 00:17:06,530

Папа, я сделаю объявление.

00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:10,000

Можешь убедить их не убивать

меня сразу и выслушать?

00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:13,440

Думаю, я достаточно им для этого нравлюсь.

00:17:13,510 --> 00:17:14,710

Здорово.

00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:16,420

Никогда не бывал в таких местах.

00:17:16,450 --> 00:17:19,090

Всегда пролетал мимо и

никогда не заглядывал внутрь.

00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:20,930

Мама, преврати нас обратно.

00:17:20,990 --> 00:17:23,730

Если признаешь,

что быть родителем это мучение.

00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:25,100

Вы, ребята, местные?

00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:27,200

Я не видел вас в своей стае.

00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:30,040

О, извини, что ты на полдня

ощутила материнскую любовь.

00:17:30,110 --> 00:17:32,720

- Против своей воли.

- А мне каково было?

00:17:32,750 --> 00:17:34,490

Эй, как думаете, что будет?

00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:35,490

Ты умрёшь.

00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:36,760

Что?

00:17:36,790 --> 00:17:39,130

Нет, нет. Нет, нет, нет, нет.

00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:40,200

Отпусти!

00:17:41,970 --> 00:17:44,310

Ты скорее умрёшь, чем освободишь нас?

00:17:44,370 --> 00:17:46,740

О, я не умру.

00:17:46,810 --> 00:17:48,750

О боже, что происходит?

00:17:48,810 --> 00:17:52,190

Я богиня Делирия, вот что происходит.

00:17:52,220 --> 00:17:54,230

Истинный облик.

00:17:54,290 --> 00:17:55,530

Один момент.

00:17:55,590 --> 00:17:56,970

Истинный облик.

00:17:57,030 --> 00:17:59,900

О, богиня Делирия, прости меня.

00:17:59,970 --> 00:18:02,340

Я приму любое твое наказание.

00:18:02,370 --> 00:18:04,310

Принеси мне жертву.

00:18:04,350 --> 00:18:05,810

Серьёзно?

00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:09,860

Если жертвовать собой ради других

это такая радость, то наслаждайся.

00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:13,100

Ладно, я согласна.

Безусловная любовь это мучение.

00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:14,870

Спасибо.

00:18:18,540 --> 00:18:20,710

Это действительно мучение.

00:18:20,780 --> 00:18:24,020

Как вы смертные это делаете?

00:18:24,090 --> 00:18:25,590

Ах да.

00:18:25,650 --> 00:18:29,960

Поскольку ты чуть не убил меня, сделаем так.

00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:34,410

Эй!

00:18:34,470 --> 00:18:35,440

Эй!

00:18:35,470 --> 00:18:37,310

Эй, эй, эй!

00:18:40,450 --> 00:18:41,650

Взять его!

00:18:41,690 --> 00:18:43,390

Стойте, стойте. Я теперь царь.

00:18:43,460 --> 00:18:44,760

Совсем ненадолго.

00:18:44,830 --> 00:18:47,000

Это не так работает, но продолжай.

00:18:47,060 --> 00:18:49,480

И хотя мне неприятно что-то кому-то приказывать,

00:18:49,866 --> 00:18:52,810

я приказываю вам выслушать Тирана.

00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:55,450

Спасибо, отец.

00:18:55,550 --> 00:18:58,590

КОлакс, ты с ними?

00:18:58,650 --> 00:19:01,090

Я понял, куда дует ветер.

00:19:01,130 --> 00:19:02,030

Гиппо?

00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,700

Я делаю то, что приходится делать.

00:19:04,730 --> 00:19:06,640

Потому до сих пор и жив.

00:19:06,670 --> 00:19:09,133

Ладно, слушайте. Я указываю людям,

что делать,

00:19:09,138 --> 00:19:11,710

потому что хочу,

чтобы все в обществе жили лучше.

00:19:11,780 --> 00:19:13,320

А вы меня за это ненавидите.

00:19:13,350 --> 00:19:16,120

Конечно, на самом деле вы ненавидите не меня.

00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:17,830

На моем месте мог быть любой.

00:19:17,930 --> 00:19:19,160

Мы бы не ненавидели Шлаба.

00:19:19,230 --> 00:19:21,930

- Но кого-то ненавидели бы.

- Да, тебя.

00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:25,770

И вновь, речь не обо мне,

а о том, кто отдаёт приказы.

00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:28,415

Итак, для тех, кто хочет,

чтобы дела были сделаны,

00:19:28,420 --> 00:19:30,899

для тех, кто хочет,

чтобы людей оставили в покое,

00:19:30,890 --> 00:19:36,866

и для тех, кто хочет видеть вражду этих двух

групп, я представляю местное правительство.

00:19:37,100 --> 00:19:41,785

С этого момента город будет разделён

на маленькие районные царства,

00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:45,831

представители которых будут спорить,

спорить и спорить о чём угодно,

00:19:45,830 --> 00:19:48,666

пока народ наблюдает,

осуждает и наслаждается этим.

00:19:49,050 --> 00:19:51,030

Как представители избираются?

00:19:51,130 --> 00:19:53,360

Вот, уже есть о чём поспорить.

00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:55,730

Я не хочу маленькое районное царство.

00:19:55,800 --> 00:19:57,570

Все вопросы к местному советнику.

00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,210

- Кто это?

- Тебе решать.

00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:01,480

- Нет, не мне.

- И не мне тоже.

00:20:01,550 --> 00:20:02,920

Ну, кто-то должен.

00:20:02,950 --> 00:20:04,920

Мы об этом голосовали?

00:20:04,990 --> 00:20:07,330

Кто-то объявлял о решении?

00:20:07,390 --> 00:20:09,000

Я не слышала.

00:20:09,060 --> 00:20:10,030

Нет. Нет.

00:20:10,060 --> 00:20:11,900

- Мы не...

- Ну надо же.

00:20:11,930 --> 00:20:13,940

- Тебе удалось.

- Я им нравлюсь?

00:20:14,010 --> 00:20:16,280

Нет, они просто

отвлеклись от ненависти к тебе.

00:20:16,340 --> 00:20:17,440

Тоже хорошо.

00:20:20,380 --> 00:20:21,420

Не стесняйтесь.

00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:23,160

Новый мост полностью безопасен.

00:20:23,190 --> 00:20:25,690

Ты абсолютно уверен, что этот не рухнет?

00:20:25,730 --> 00:20:26,830

Увереннее некуда.

00:20:26,900 --> 00:20:28,500

Ты говорил так же о прошлом.

00:20:28,530 --> 00:20:32,710

Если ты будешь попрекать меня прошлым,

то я даже не знаю, что тебе и сказать.

00:20:32,780 --> 00:20:33,940

Ладно, ладно.

00:20:33,980 --> 00:20:36,850

Хочешь, чтобы я сказал,

что было глупо строить мост из грязи?

00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,220

Нет же, нет.

00:20:38,250 --> 00:20:41,030

Я использовал знания,

которые у меня тогда были.

00:20:41,090 --> 00:20:43,555

Я посмотрел на грязь и подумал: ну,

она подходит для хижин,

00:20:43,550 --> 00:20:47,133

для покрытия стен, для крыш, даже для печей.

00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:48,470

Я делал печи из грязи.

00:20:48,540 --> 00:20:49,640

Никто не мог знать.

00:20:49,780 --> 00:20:52,750

Кладёшь ее, даёшь высохнуть,

и она твердеет, как камень.

00:20:52,810 --> 00:20:55,390

И я еще подумал: к тому же она взята из реки.

00:20:55,420 --> 00:20:56,420

Здравая логика.

00:20:56,490 --> 00:20:57,790

Это имело смысл.

00:20:57,860 --> 00:21:00,660

Моей ошибкой было не учесть влажность.

00:21:00,730 --> 00:21:02,100

Ключ в этом, да?

00:21:02,170 --> 00:21:06,580

Поэтому я спросил себя: что может

очень быстро намокнуть и высохнуть?

00:21:06,610 --> 00:21:08,010

- И меня озарило.

- О нет.

00:21:08,050 --> 00:21:09,420

Песок!

00:21:12,460 --> 00:21:13,960

Паскуда ты!

00:21:14,030 --> 00:21:16,200

Нам не нужен мост.

00:00:03,106 --> 00:00:04,275

- Over here!

- Help!

00:00:04,275 --> 00:00:05,679

I'm doing the best I can.

00:00:05,679 --> 00:00:08,016

If you just grab this branch,

I can pull you out.

00:00:08,016 --> 00:00:09,653

And let go of the water?

00:00:09,653 --> 00:00:10,789

That's a death sentence!

00:00:10,789 --> 00:00:11,958

What's going on?

00:00:12,058 --> 00:00:13,293

What isn't?

00:00:13,293 --> 00:00:15,130

We've got locusts

eating our crops.

00:00:15,130 --> 00:00:16,567

Our grave-digger died, so

he was just sitting there.

00:00:16,567 --> 00:00:19,238

There's a bat infestation

in the cheese cave.

00:00:19,238 --> 00:00:21,009

The fire-breathing

orcs are back.

00:00:21,009 --> 00:00:22,311

And now the bridge

has collapsed.

00:00:22,311 --> 00:00:24,348

I was so preoccupied

with whether I could

00:00:24,348 --> 00:00:26,153

build a bridge out

of mud, I didn't

00:00:26,153 --> 00:00:27,823

stop to think if I should.

00:00:27,823 --> 00:00:29,091

Stop wallowing, Simon.

00:00:29,091 --> 00:00:30,494

We can do the

post mortem later.

00:00:30,494 --> 00:00:32,331

Sounds like you're

ready to condemn the guy!

00:00:32,331 --> 00:00:35,204

Ultimately, isn't this

your responsibility?

00:00:35,204 --> 00:00:36,874

I'm just trying to save you.

00:00:36,874 --> 00:00:38,043

Save me?

00:00:38,043 --> 00:00:41,216

Or save your

precious reputation?

00:00:41,316 --> 00:00:43,119

All right, what do we got?

Bridge collapse?

00:00:43,219 --> 00:00:45,056

I need rope, rescue

dog, swimmers,

00:00:45,056 --> 00:00:46,359

and anything that floats.

00:00:46,359 --> 00:00:48,063

And, Hippo,

I'll take some of that tea

00:00:48,163 --> 00:00:49,699

you make out of coffee beans.

00:00:49,699 --> 00:00:50,467

On it.

00:00:50,568 --> 00:00:51,837

Stup, whatever

you're doing, drop it.

00:00:51,837 --> 00:00:53,073

No, Mother.

00:00:53,073 --> 00:00:54,809

Do not take Stupendous

away right now.

00:00:54,809 --> 00:00:56,379

She is saving people's lives.

00:00:56,379 --> 00:00:58,483

Wrong, she's just changing

their death dates.

00:00:58,483 --> 00:01:00,721

I need her for something

far more important.

00:01:00,721 --> 00:01:02,124

Mom, no.

00:01:02,124 --> 00:01:03,494

I told you I don't like

being turned into a--

00:01:03,494 --> 00:01:04,229

quack!

00:01:04,229 --> 00:01:05,431

What could be more important

00:01:05,431 --> 00:01:07,636

that also requires

my sister to be a goose?

00:01:07,636 --> 00:01:10,073

Well, whenever Athena

gets a new temple,

00:01:10,073 --> 00:01:11,978

Stupendous and I

become geese so we

00:01:11,978 --> 00:01:13,346

can go and defecate on it.

00:01:13,346 --> 00:01:16,018

It's a fun way for me to bond

with my favorite child.

00:01:16,018 --> 00:01:18,090

Great unnecessary

burn, Mother.

00:01:18,090 --> 00:01:19,091

Can anyone help me?

00:01:19,091 --> 00:01:20,728

Anyone at all?

00:01:20,728 --> 00:01:21,864

Dad, good, you're here.

00:01:21,864 --> 00:01:22,866

Do you see this?

00:01:22,866 --> 00:01:23,935

See what's happening here?

00:01:23,935 --> 00:01:25,137

There's no olive oil.

00:01:25,237 --> 00:01:26,874

What am I supposed

to dip my bread in?

00:01:26,874 --> 00:01:28,243

Oh my God, help.

00:01:28,243 --> 00:01:29,980

Thank you, I do need help.

00:01:29,980 --> 00:01:31,583

Dad, rope, rope-- ah!

00:01:31,583 --> 00:01:33,453

Are you happy?

You could have saved her.

00:01:33,453 --> 00:01:34,923

Well, as far

as we know, she's

00:01:34,923 --> 00:01:36,392

living happily downstream now.

00:01:36,392 --> 00:01:38,196

If you need me,

I'll be at the bar.

00:01:38,196 --> 00:01:39,231

I need you.

00:01:39,231 --> 00:01:41,002

And I'll be at the bar.

00:01:41,002 --> 00:01:42,271

[sheep bleats]

00:01:42,271 --> 00:01:45,612

[dramatic lyre music]

00:01:45,612 --> 00:01:52,592

♪ ♪

00:02:08,323 --> 00:02:10,393

OK, one chicken for you.

00:02:10,393 --> 00:02:13,266

That's the standard payment

for the loss of a loved one.

00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:15,303

Wait a minute,

you didn't lose a loved one.

00:02:15,303 --> 00:02:16,740

So I don't deserve a chicken?

00:02:16,740 --> 00:02:18,209

Son, a word.

00:02:18,209 --> 00:02:19,378

What is it?

00:02:19,378 --> 00:02:21,182

Just circling back

on the olive oil.

00:02:21,182 --> 00:02:22,586

Dad, I'm incredibly busy.

00:02:22,586 --> 00:02:25,290

I know that's an

alien concept for you,

00:02:25,290 --> 00:02:27,328

but I'm dealing with a

million crises at the moment

00:02:27,328 --> 00:02:30,200

and olive oil is not

at the top of the list.

00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:31,937

Yeah, but people

love olive oil.

00:02:31,937 --> 00:02:33,206

I have to warn you, son.

00:02:33,206 --> 00:02:35,110

The folks down at the bar

are not exactly writing

00:02:35,110 --> 00:02:36,947

you love songs as it is.

00:02:36,947 --> 00:02:38,249

Oh, the bar.

00:02:38,249 --> 00:02:40,421

Yes, well, I suppose you'd

be the expert on that.

00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:42,057

I'm not sure about expert.

00:02:42,057 --> 00:02:43,459

More of an amateur.

00:02:43,459 --> 00:02:45,866

But why not throw

them a bone, son?

00:02:45,866 --> 00:02:47,067

It's just olive oil.

00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:48,169

It's work to get

olive oil, Dad.

00:02:48,269 --> 00:02:49,606

It's work to get anything.

00:02:49,606 --> 00:02:51,275

Well, that has not

been my experience.

00:02:51,275 --> 00:02:53,346

Of course it hasn't,

because I do all the work.

00:02:53,346 --> 00:02:54,950

You see, that

attitude may play

00:02:54,950 --> 00:02:56,820

a part in your unpopularity.

00:02:56,820 --> 00:02:57,889

Am I unpop--

00:02:57,889 --> 00:02:58,925

all right, you know what, Dad?

00:02:59,025 --> 00:03:01,129

You want olive oil, you're

in charge of olive oil.

00:03:01,129 --> 00:03:02,364

There's a trade

meeting tomorrow.

00:03:02,364 --> 00:03:03,601

Why don't you handle it?

00:03:03,601 --> 00:03:05,939

I like to try new

things now and again.

00:03:05,939 --> 00:03:07,642

Happy to give it a go.

00:03:07,743 --> 00:03:09,680

That was a weird move putting

Dad in charge of olive oil.

00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:11,984

I mean, I get it it's

not a huge priority,

00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:13,220

but I do want olive oil.

00:03:13,220 --> 00:03:14,890

Of course you do.

Everyone does.

00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:16,492

I want olive oil.

00:03:16,492 --> 00:03:18,664

But either Dad pulls it off, in

which case, great, olive oil.

00:03:18,664 --> 00:03:22,037

Or, and let's be honest, this

is what's going to happen,

00:03:22,037 --> 00:03:23,674

we're no worse off

than we started.

00:03:23,674 --> 00:03:27,381

And he's actually had to face a

reality that things take work.

00:03:27,381 --> 00:03:29,853

Huh, wow, I got to hand

it to you, brother.

00:03:29,853 --> 00:03:30,822

That was well played.

00:03:30,822 --> 00:03:31,757

Why, thank you.

00:03:31,857 --> 00:03:33,827

You know, what you

got there is a win-win.

00:03:33,827 --> 00:03:34,897

Win-win.

00:03:34,897 --> 00:03:36,365

Huh, I like that.

00:03:36,365 --> 00:03:37,903

Did you just make it up?

- Yeah.

00:03:37,903 --> 00:03:39,138

I mean, not just.

00:03:39,138 --> 00:03:40,307

I've been workshopping it.

00:03:40,407 --> 00:03:42,946

It's like a win on the one

side and a win on the other.

00:03:42,946 --> 00:03:47,021

Almost like an object, like

a perfectly balanced object.

00:03:47,021 --> 00:03:49,058

Whoever wins, we win.

00:03:49,058 --> 00:03:51,129

Win or also win.

00:03:51,129 --> 00:03:53,166

I said I workshopped

it already.

00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:55,170

Did you eat enough berries?

00:03:55,170 --> 00:03:57,542

Athena has quite a few

temples to poop on,

00:03:57,542 --> 00:03:59,245

and you wouldn't

want to run out.

00:03:59,245 --> 00:04:01,182

Yes, Mom.

I got enough berries.

00:04:01,182 --> 00:04:03,019

Could you stop

running my entire life

00:04:03,019 --> 00:04:04,255

down to the food in my belly?

00:04:04,255 --> 00:04:06,493

Oh, come on, you love this.

00:04:06,493 --> 00:04:08,697

No, I don't.

I had stuff I wanted to do.

00:04:08,697 --> 00:04:11,504

Well, you're my daughter,

which means you work for me.

00:04:11,504 --> 00:04:13,908

all: Rock, rock, rock, rock!

00:04:13,908 --> 00:04:15,044

Rock, rock?

00:04:15,044 --> 00:04:17,248

What are they saying?

00:04:17,248 --> 00:04:18,316

Ugh.

00:04:18,316 --> 00:04:21,021

- Mom!

- [screaming]

00:04:21,021 --> 00:04:22,357

Mom, are you OK?

00:04:22,357 --> 00:04:24,195

[dog barking]

00:04:24,195 --> 00:04:26,132

Ah!

00:04:26,132 --> 00:04:28,003

No, no!

- Get off, you--

00:04:28,003 --> 00:04:29,171

Ow, ugh!

00:04:29,171 --> 00:04:30,407

Why didn't you zap him?

00:04:30,407 --> 00:04:32,278

Was this some kind

of game for you?

00:04:32,278 --> 00:04:33,748

Zap him?

00:04:33,748 --> 00:04:36,185

Yeah, why didn't you zap him

and turn back into yourself?

00:04:36,185 --> 00:04:37,188

Myself?

00:04:37,188 --> 00:04:38,290

I am myself.

00:04:38,290 --> 00:04:39,760

Stop playing, Mom.

00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:42,933

I don't understand what

you are saying right now.

00:04:42,933 --> 00:04:44,201

Oh, wow.

00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,039

So you really think

you're a goose?

00:04:46,039 --> 00:04:47,207

What else would I be?

00:04:47,207 --> 00:04:48,544

OK, just going to check.

00:04:48,544 --> 00:04:52,351

If I say Deliria is a weak

little stinky butt who

00:04:52,351 --> 00:04:54,422

bosses people around

because she's insecure,

00:04:54,422 --> 00:04:56,058

your response is what?

00:04:56,058 --> 00:04:57,461

What is Deliria?

00:04:57,461 --> 00:04:59,298

- Oh, man.

- There they are!

00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:00,400

Good boy.

00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,204

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

00:05:02,204 --> 00:05:05,879

[dramatic music]

00:05:05,879 --> 00:05:07,381

[groans]

00:05:07,381 --> 00:05:09,819

Oh, good--

good morning, Kolax.

00:05:09,819 --> 00:05:13,392

Have you been standing

there long or--

00:05:13,392 --> 00:05:15,263

I have the daily

disasters, Your Highness.

00:05:15,263 --> 00:05:16,465

You wish to be briefed?

00:05:16,465 --> 00:05:17,969

Oh, yes.

Good, good.

00:05:17,969 --> 00:05:21,475

The sinkhole now has

birthed a second sinkhole.

00:05:21,576 --> 00:05:24,616

And the grain storage is now

the rotten grain storage.

00:05:24,616 --> 00:05:27,088

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But let's start with olive oil.

00:05:27,088 --> 00:05:28,557

Give me dessert first.

00:05:28,557 --> 00:05:30,595

Olive oil is actually the

one thing that's gone right.

00:05:30,595 --> 00:05:32,732

I'm sorry, gone right?

As in--

00:05:32,732 --> 00:05:34,168

It's been running

very smoothly

00:05:34,168 --> 00:05:36,039

since you put your father

in charge, Your Highness.

00:05:36,039 --> 00:05:37,207

[growls]

00:05:37,207 --> 00:05:39,813

And it makes me so mad.

00:05:39,813 --> 00:05:41,248

♪ ♪

00:05:41,248 --> 00:05:43,353

And that, my good

friend, is how you

00:05:43,353 --> 00:05:45,156

get kicked out of Gomorrah.

00:05:45,156 --> 00:05:47,127

[laughing]

00:05:47,127 --> 00:05:49,064

What is this?

What's happened?

00:05:49,064 --> 00:05:51,135

Ah, son, want some olive oil?

00:05:51,135 --> 00:05:52,404

We've got plenty.

00:05:52,404 --> 00:05:54,275

How-- how did you

manage to get olive oil?

00:05:54,275 --> 00:05:56,478

It's really hard to get.

00:05:56,478 --> 00:05:58,717

I mean, not always that hard.

00:05:58,717 --> 00:06:02,124

It's often very easy,

but how did you do it?

00:06:02,124 --> 00:06:03,594

Well, I missed

that trade meeting

00:06:03,594 --> 00:06:06,700

you wanted me to go to,

so I came here for a drink

00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:09,238

and ran into this

ugly son of a bitch

00:06:09,238 --> 00:06:10,941

who had a ton of the stuff.

00:06:10,941 --> 00:06:12,512

This guy!

[laughs]

00:06:12,512 --> 00:06:14,481

The cannibal chief

who wants to eat us.

00:06:14,481 --> 00:06:15,885

If you could look

past the cannibal part,

00:06:15,885 --> 00:06:19,593

you'd see a human being,

who eats human beings

00:06:19,593 --> 00:06:21,563

with olive oil that I share.

00:06:21,563 --> 00:06:23,466

Well, it's all

making sense now.

00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:24,869

That's the Shlub way--

00:06:24,869 --> 00:06:27,074

blunder into a

situation where someone

00:06:27,074 --> 00:06:28,410

just gives you what you need.

00:06:28,410 --> 00:06:30,447

If by blunder you mean

get along with people

00:06:30,447 --> 00:06:32,652

well enough that they

like you and want to help.

00:06:32,652 --> 00:06:34,422

Yeah.

Why are you picking on Shlub?

00:06:34,422 --> 00:06:35,791

If I may,

00:06:35,791 --> 00:06:38,296

it's this insistence on

telling people what to do

00:06:38,296 --> 00:06:39,599

that makes them not like you.

00:06:39,699 --> 00:06:41,302

- They do like me.

- Uh--

00:06:41,302 --> 00:06:43,406

Shut up, Miriam.

You've got an agenda.

00:06:43,406 --> 00:06:45,410

And did you put the chicken

in the baby carriage?

00:06:45,511 --> 00:06:47,515

What of it?

00:06:47,515 --> 00:06:49,853

You know what, who cares

what the citizens like.

00:06:49,853 --> 00:06:50,554

[all booing]

00:06:50,554 --> 00:06:51,590

- Ouch.

- Mm-mm.

00:06:51,690 --> 00:06:55,430

You just like lounging

about in bars doing nothing.

00:06:55,430 --> 00:06:57,602

But to do that, somebody

needs to be doing work.

00:06:57,602 --> 00:06:59,673

And until you all start

doing it voluntarily,

00:06:59,673 --> 00:07:00,941

you're going to

need to be told to.

00:07:01,041 --> 00:07:04,015

And if that's unpopular,

then perhaps popularity

00:07:04,015 --> 00:07:05,249

itself is a problem.

00:07:05,249 --> 00:07:06,553

What's the word

I'm looking for?

00:07:06,553 --> 00:07:10,293

It's right on the tip

of my-- oh, right, boo!

00:07:10,293 --> 00:07:12,431

[all booing]

00:07:12,431 --> 00:07:15,037

Why don't you get out

of here, you big weenie?

00:07:15,037 --> 00:07:16,339

Yeah, get out of here.

00:07:16,339 --> 00:07:17,842

We hate you!

00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:22,552

Great job on the

olive oil, Shlub.

00:07:22,652 --> 00:07:24,488

- Yeah!

- Whoo-hoo!

00:07:24,589 --> 00:07:25,825

[laughter]

- My man, Shlub.

00:07:25,825 --> 00:07:27,360

Guess it wasn't

a win-win after all.

00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:28,731

Yes, it was.

It was.

00:07:28,731 --> 00:07:31,268

It's just one of the wins

didn't wind up feeling quite

00:07:31,268 --> 00:07:32,838

as winny as the other one.

00:07:32,838 --> 00:07:34,710

Still smarting from getting

thrown out of the tavern?

00:07:34,710 --> 00:07:36,312

I wasn't thrown out.

00:07:36,412 --> 00:07:37,682

Not bodily.

00:07:37,682 --> 00:07:39,552

It's not like I was

picked up and thrown.

00:07:39,552 --> 00:07:40,688

I was pushed.

00:07:40,688 --> 00:07:42,692

My feet never left the ground.

00:07:42,692 --> 00:07:47,234

Or-- yes, they did,

but only for a moment.

00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:48,604

If I'm being honest, I--

00:07:48,604 --> 00:07:50,975

I really wanted

to see Dad fail.

00:07:51,075 --> 00:07:51,710

I know.

00:07:51,710 --> 00:07:53,012

That would have been awesome!

00:07:53,012 --> 00:07:54,683

The guy waltzes

through life drinking

00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,352

and telling his dumb

stories, just getting

00:07:56,352 --> 00:07:57,788

everything handed to him.

00:07:57,788 --> 00:08:00,227

Meanwhile, guys like

us who do all the work

00:08:00,227 --> 00:08:02,097

get treated like crap.

00:08:02,097 --> 00:08:03,065

Thank you.

00:08:03,065 --> 00:08:06,172

[sighs] I guess that's

just the way it is.

00:08:06,172 --> 00:08:07,909

Not necessarily.

00:08:07,909 --> 00:08:10,948

What if letting other people

do the work is the power move?

00:08:10,948 --> 00:08:13,621

Look at Mom, she has all

the power in the relationship,

00:08:13,621 --> 00:08:15,558

and she does nothing.

00:08:15,558 --> 00:08:17,929

What if that's the secret?

00:08:17,929 --> 00:08:20,801

Dad, once again,

great work on the olive oil.

00:08:20,801 --> 00:08:22,671

Well, I had fun doing it.

00:08:22,671 --> 00:08:24,710

So I'm not sure

I'd call it work.

00:08:24,710 --> 00:08:25,645

Yes.

00:08:25,645 --> 00:08:27,682

So we were thinking,

what if you

00:08:27,682 --> 00:08:29,552

took on more responsibilities?

00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:31,556

Well, as long

as responsibilities continue

00:08:31,556 --> 00:08:34,061

to be no more demanding

than no responsibilities,

00:08:34,061 --> 00:08:35,397

I'd be happy to.

00:08:35,397 --> 00:08:36,833

What did you have in mind?

00:08:36,833 --> 00:08:39,038

Well, that sinkhole

for starters.

00:08:39,038 --> 00:08:40,306

[yelps]

00:08:40,306 --> 00:08:41,576

And produce.

00:08:41,576 --> 00:08:43,947

As you can see,

the figs are a bit recycled.

00:08:43,947 --> 00:08:45,851

There's still

the bat infestation

00:08:45,851 --> 00:08:48,256

and the fire-breathing

orcs to deal with.

00:08:48,256 --> 00:08:49,926

Oh, my sheep!

00:08:49,926 --> 00:08:53,132

And any other dispute,

shortages, or avoidable deaths

00:08:53,132 --> 00:08:54,067

that happen today.

00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:56,071

Everyone, from now on,

the sinkhole, produce,

00:08:56,071 --> 00:08:59,746

bat infestation, and orcs will

be handled by the eminently

00:08:59,746 --> 00:09:02,017

competent and capable Shlub.

00:09:02,017 --> 00:09:02,919

[cheering]

00:09:02,919 --> 00:09:05,390

Give me your full name

so it's official.

00:09:05,390 --> 00:09:07,729

Shlubrick Michael [bleep].

00:09:07,729 --> 00:09:09,298

That's a joke, right?

00:09:09,298 --> 00:09:10,601

Swear to God.

00:09:10,601 --> 00:09:14,475

Shlubrick Michael [bleep],

our new sinkhole,

00:09:14,475 --> 00:09:18,083

produce, bat, and orc czar.

00:09:18,083 --> 00:09:20,854

[cheering]

00:09:20,854 --> 00:09:22,625

Hey, you know they're setting

you up for failure, right?

00:09:22,625 --> 00:09:23,661

Tyrannis?

00:09:23,761 --> 00:09:25,163

He wouldn't do that.

00:09:25,163 --> 00:09:27,735

Uh, they're not exactly

being candid about it.

00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:29,505

Ty wants you to

eat crap, which is

00:09:29,605 --> 00:09:30,908

not a great look for a king.

00:09:30,908 --> 00:09:33,681

Huh, well, maybe

he'll get what he wants.

00:09:33,681 --> 00:09:36,152

I'm certainly not going

to fill in a sinkhole.

00:09:36,152 --> 00:09:36,920

Who wants a drink?

00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:39,358

To failure!

all: To failure!

00:09:39,458 --> 00:09:40,595

No, you know what?

00:09:40,595 --> 00:09:41,797

If you're failing

means he wins,

00:09:41,797 --> 00:09:43,099

I'm not going to let it happen.

00:09:43,199 --> 00:09:44,836

Plus, you're such a

chill guy, I don't

00:09:44,836 --> 00:09:46,439

mind lifting a shovel for you.

00:09:46,439 --> 00:09:47,641

I'll fill that sinkhole.

00:09:47,641 --> 00:09:48,643

Well, I'll-- I'll help too.

00:09:48,643 --> 00:09:49,612

Yeah, me too.

00:09:49,612 --> 00:09:50,614

For Shlub.

00:09:50,614 --> 00:09:52,551

all: For Shlub!

00:09:52,551 --> 00:09:54,254

So you don't

remember when I was 3

00:09:54,254 --> 00:09:56,593

and you got sick of waiting

for me to be grown up

00:09:56,593 --> 00:09:58,496

so you left me to be

raised by fire ants?

00:09:58,496 --> 00:09:59,766

No.

00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:00,902

You don't remember

when you offered to trade

00:10:00,902 --> 00:10:02,505

me to Hestia for a necklace?

00:10:02,505 --> 00:10:04,609

That doesn't sound very nice.

00:10:04,609 --> 00:10:06,813

You don't remember

throwing me at a bear?

00:10:06,813 --> 00:10:08,349

Oh, now you're

making this up.

00:10:08,349 --> 00:10:11,255

Mom, I'm going to try

something to jog your memory.

00:10:11,255 --> 00:10:12,323

Don't be mad.

00:10:12,323 --> 00:10:13,828

[groaning]

00:10:13,828 --> 00:10:14,696

Ow.

00:10:14,696 --> 00:10:16,265

Now why would you do that?

00:10:16,265 --> 00:10:17,333

It had a 50-50 chance.

00:10:17,433 --> 00:10:20,373

Oh, wait, maybe you can just

zap without remembering.

00:10:20,373 --> 00:10:21,441

Try this.

00:10:21,441 --> 00:10:23,279

And zap, zap.

00:10:23,279 --> 00:10:24,247

Come on, concentrate.

00:10:24,347 --> 00:10:25,884

Think of whatever you

usually think of when

00:10:25,884 --> 00:10:27,454

you know you're a goddess.

00:10:27,454 --> 00:10:28,690

Zap.

00:10:28,690 --> 00:10:30,460

You keep saying

that word, "goddess."

00:10:30,460 --> 00:10:31,530

Yeah, because you are one.

00:10:31,530 --> 00:10:32,932

I don't know what that is.

00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:34,401

But I know what a mother is.

00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:37,708

A mother is loving and kind

and takes care of her children.

00:10:37,708 --> 00:10:39,746

In what world is that true?

00:10:39,746 --> 00:10:41,683

Well, I'm sure if I

remembered your childhood,

00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:43,654

I would remember

warming you up at night

00:10:43,654 --> 00:10:45,858

and feeding you and

teaching you to fly

00:10:45,858 --> 00:10:47,662

and protecting you from

danger, because that

00:10:47,662 --> 00:10:48,864

is what a mother does.

00:10:48,864 --> 00:10:50,902

Yeah, a mother goose.

00:10:50,902 --> 00:10:52,738

Huh, maybe this is it.

00:10:52,738 --> 00:10:54,408

Maybe I just take

the win right here,

00:10:54,408 --> 00:10:56,980

get myself four or five

years living with a good mom,

00:10:56,980 --> 00:10:59,317

and then we both

get killed or eaten.

00:10:59,317 --> 00:11:00,119

I don't hate it.

00:11:00,219 --> 00:11:03,393

Oh, sit and let

me make you a nest.

00:11:03,493 --> 00:11:05,798

[soft music]

00:11:05,798 --> 00:11:08,002

You know what, I'm not going

to feel the slightest bit

00:11:08,002 --> 00:11:09,572

guilty that we made Dad fail.

00:11:09,572 --> 00:11:10,641

It was a lesson he

needed to learn.

00:11:10,641 --> 00:11:12,144

Absolutely.

00:11:12,144 --> 00:11:14,582

This is the kind of win-win

situation I was talking about,

00:11:14,582 --> 00:11:16,085

one where there's only one win.

00:11:16,085 --> 00:11:18,489

Wait a minute,

the sinkhole is filled in.

00:11:18,489 --> 00:11:20,360

The bats and orcs are gone.

00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:21,461

Figs?

00:11:21,461 --> 00:11:22,899

[laughter]

00:11:22,899 --> 00:11:25,604

Well, I was so drunk,

I crashed right

00:11:25,604 --> 00:11:27,808

into this huge

statue of a sphinx,

00:11:27,808 --> 00:11:30,179

broke her face penis clean off.

00:11:30,179 --> 00:11:32,551

[laughter]

00:11:32,551 --> 00:11:34,354

Uh-oh, boss man's here.

00:11:34,354 --> 00:11:35,624

Everybody look busy.

00:11:35,624 --> 00:11:36,760

[all booing]

00:11:36,760 --> 00:11:37,929

There you are, son.

00:11:37,929 --> 00:11:40,433

Good news--

somehow it all got done.

00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:42,237

Sinkhole, orcs, bats.

00:11:42,337 --> 00:11:44,643

I didn't even ask.

- He didn't have to.

00:11:44,643 --> 00:11:45,945

We like him.

00:11:45,945 --> 00:11:47,748

Oh, and this

old goat lover has

00:11:47,748 --> 00:11:49,686

granted us 100 years peace.

00:11:49,686 --> 00:11:50,822

You're the goat lover.

00:11:50,822 --> 00:11:52,357

It's never for love.

00:11:52,357 --> 00:11:54,394

[laughter]

00:11:54,394 --> 00:11:55,396

Wait.

00:11:55,564 --> 00:11:58,102

So everyone here just busted

their asses for my dad?

00:11:58,102 --> 00:12:00,742

But when I ask you to do

something, I'm the bad guy?

00:12:00,742 --> 00:12:01,844

We don't like you.

00:12:01,944 --> 00:12:03,012

Anyone can do what he does.

00:12:03,012 --> 00:12:04,916

He drinks and insults people.

00:12:04,916 --> 00:12:06,653

Hey, big nose,

how's it hanging?

00:12:06,653 --> 00:12:08,255

Oh, there goes dogbreath.

00:12:08,255 --> 00:12:11,261

Crazy chicken mom over

there with her chicken baby.

00:12:11,261 --> 00:12:12,197

Over the line.

00:12:12,364 --> 00:12:15,069

I'm just doing what he

does, just goofing around.

00:12:15,069 --> 00:12:17,274

It sure as hell didn't

feel like goofing around.

00:12:17,274 --> 00:12:19,612

I did what my dumb

father always does.

00:12:19,612 --> 00:12:20,915

Now you're

insulting my friend?

00:12:20,915 --> 00:12:22,818

Oh, come on,

you're not even friends.

00:12:22,818 --> 00:12:24,154

You only like him

when you're drunk.

00:12:24,154 --> 00:12:26,793

Now our drinking

is up for discussion?

00:12:26,793 --> 00:12:28,731

You are absolutely the worst.

00:12:28,731 --> 00:12:30,233

I'll tell you what I see.

00:12:30,233 --> 00:12:31,903

I'm looking around and I see

a city that works a whole lot

00:12:31,903 --> 00:12:33,707

better when Shlub's in charge.

00:12:33,707 --> 00:12:34,976

I'm failing upward.

00:12:34,976 --> 00:12:36,178

Well, I'm looking

at a bunch of people

00:12:36,278 --> 00:12:39,586

who got suckered into doing

a lot of work for a drunk guy.

00:12:39,586 --> 00:12:40,588

[ominous music]

00:12:40,588 --> 00:12:42,558

[chicken clucking]

00:12:42,558 --> 00:12:43,793

♪ ♪

00:12:43,793 --> 00:12:45,129

You don't have to throw me out.

00:12:45,129 --> 00:12:46,499

I'll just go.

00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:47,868

I'm going, I said.

00:12:47,868 --> 00:12:49,739

[soft music]

00:12:49,839 --> 00:12:52,778

[both laughing]

00:12:52,778 --> 00:12:56,953

♪ ♪

00:12:56,953 --> 00:13:00,059

Hey, Mom,

for old time's sake?

00:13:00,059 --> 00:13:07,173

♪ ♪

00:13:10,514 --> 00:13:11,481

Hm.

00:13:11,481 --> 00:13:12,618

Athena's temple.

00:13:12,618 --> 00:13:13,687

Athena?

00:13:13,687 --> 00:13:14,856

Oh, that sounds familiar.

00:13:14,856 --> 00:13:15,858

Oh, no, it's nothing.

00:13:15,858 --> 00:13:16,960

Forget I said it.

00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,897

Athena's just a dumb word.

00:13:18,897 --> 00:13:21,301

Yes, we were flying

there, but why?

00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,072

No reason.

We got to relocate.

00:13:23,072 --> 00:13:24,240

There's a better

lake over there.

00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:26,579

Let's go.

- Oh, wait, I remember.

00:13:26,579 --> 00:13:28,517

No, don't remember now.

00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:29,685

Remember later.

00:13:29,685 --> 00:13:31,623

Just stay dumb a little longer.

00:13:31,623 --> 00:13:35,463

I am Deliria, the goddess.

00:13:35,463 --> 00:13:36,399

Damn it.

00:13:36,499 --> 00:13:38,202

And you didn't want

me to remember that.

00:13:38,202 --> 00:13:39,906

You were going

to keep that from me.

00:13:39,906 --> 00:13:41,843

Just for a couple

of days or years.

00:13:41,843 --> 00:13:44,114

I'm going through

hell as a goose.

00:13:44,114 --> 00:13:46,753

I worried about you,

I doted on you.

00:13:46,753 --> 00:13:48,657

I built you a nest.

00:13:48,657 --> 00:13:49,926

It's called parenting.

00:13:49,926 --> 00:13:51,529

It's called torture.

00:13:51,529 --> 00:13:54,569

The unconditional love, the

feeling that I would rather

00:13:54,569 --> 00:13:56,038

die than see you harmed?

00:13:56,138 --> 00:13:58,510

I wouldn't wish that

on my worst enemy.

00:13:58,510 --> 00:13:59,679

You're being dramatic.

00:13:59,679 --> 00:14:01,482

I'm allowed to be dramatic.

00:14:01,482 --> 00:14:03,085

True form.

00:14:04,689 --> 00:14:06,526

True form.

00:14:06,526 --> 00:14:07,628

True form!

00:14:07,628 --> 00:14:09,497

Ow!

00:14:11,201 --> 00:14:13,039

♪ If you show me a woman ♪

00:14:13,039 --> 00:14:15,276

♪ A man or a beast ♪

00:14:15,276 --> 00:14:20,186

♪ I'll show you a

delectable sexual feast ♪

00:14:20,186 --> 00:14:22,090

Ah, I was just

wondering whether I

00:14:22,090 --> 00:14:24,061

might pull off a fifth wind.

00:14:24,061 --> 00:14:25,429

Yeah, we've been talking.

00:14:25,429 --> 00:14:26,833

You're the hottest

thing in Krapopolis

00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,670

since, well, olive oil.

00:14:28,670 --> 00:14:29,772

It is delicious.

00:14:29,772 --> 00:14:30,808

Hot and cold.

00:14:30,808 --> 00:14:32,010

I'll cut to the chase.

00:14:32,010 --> 00:14:33,045

We're going to

storm the castle.

00:14:33,045 --> 00:14:34,615

We're going to do what?

00:14:34,615 --> 00:14:35,851

Tyrannis had his chance.

00:14:35,851 --> 00:14:38,356

The people want new management.

00:14:38,356 --> 00:14:40,828

My army is at your

disposal, King Shlub.

00:14:40,828 --> 00:14:41,930

If you want it, that is.

00:14:41,930 --> 00:14:42,965

What do you say?

00:14:43,065 --> 00:14:44,101

What do I say?

00:14:44,101 --> 00:14:45,269

I say you're all nuts.

00:14:45,269 --> 00:14:47,340

That's my son you're

talking about.

00:14:47,340 --> 00:14:49,612

Come on, your son

wanted you to fail.

00:14:49,612 --> 00:14:51,015

And I had a blast doing it.

00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,484

All good in the hood.

00:14:52,484 --> 00:14:55,056

Wait, hold on, it's beginning

to seem like you actually

00:14:55,056 --> 00:14:56,727

want me to be in charge.

00:14:56,827 --> 00:14:58,295

We do.

[all cheering]

00:14:58,295 --> 00:15:00,033

There's been

a misunderstanding.

00:15:00,033 --> 00:15:01,268

I don't want to be king.

00:15:01,268 --> 00:15:02,838

And you don't want that either.

00:15:02,838 --> 00:15:03,940

You telling me what I want?

00:15:03,940 --> 00:15:05,977

[all grumbling]

00:15:05,977 --> 00:15:07,247

I see what's happening here.

00:15:07,247 --> 00:15:09,117

I believe your

recent infatuation

00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:12,190

with me had less to do with

what I represent and more

00:15:12,190 --> 00:15:14,261

to do with your

own empowerment,

00:15:14,261 --> 00:15:16,766

specifically in

opposition to a man who

00:15:16,766 --> 00:15:18,102

wants to tell you what to do.

00:15:18,202 --> 00:15:20,373

But all I represent is

nothing, doing nothing,

00:15:20,373 --> 00:15:23,045

standing for nothing,

which means I'd rather

00:15:23,146 --> 00:15:25,684

let Tyrannis do his

own thing as much

00:15:25,684 --> 00:15:27,454

as I'd rather you do yours.

00:15:27,454 --> 00:15:30,192

I can understand wanting

to see a king fall,

00:15:30,192 --> 00:15:31,830

but we all have a choice.

00:15:31,830 --> 00:15:33,265

Do you oppose control?

00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:35,169

In which case you should

forget this nonsense

00:15:35,169 --> 00:15:36,304

and go back to drinking.

00:15:36,304 --> 00:15:38,309

Or do you in the

end choose conflict,

00:15:38,309 --> 00:15:41,883

the thrill of retribution

and constant crisis?

00:15:41,883 --> 00:15:43,119

Constant crisis!

00:15:43,119 --> 00:15:44,622

Let's storm the castle!

00:15:47,694 --> 00:15:50,935

[all yelling]

00:15:50,935 --> 00:15:53,673

[grunting]

00:15:53,673 --> 00:15:54,909

[sighs]

00:15:54,909 --> 00:15:56,646

[all yelling]

00:15:56,646 --> 00:15:58,817

Do you hear that?

They're storming the palace.

00:15:58,817 --> 00:16:00,119

They're storming the palace.

00:16:00,219 --> 00:16:01,355

Yes, thank you, Kolax.

00:16:01,355 --> 00:16:03,358

You should be on the front

line protecting me right now

00:16:03,358 --> 00:16:05,163

instead of telling me

what I already know.

00:16:05,163 --> 00:16:07,167

I think I serve

a vital purpose right

00:16:07,167 --> 00:16:09,070

here as your trusted news guy.

00:16:09,070 --> 00:16:10,908

[chuckles nervously]

Oh, did you see this?

00:16:10,908 --> 00:16:12,410

They're calling for your head.

00:16:12,410 --> 00:16:14,549

- Go.

- Oh.

00:16:14,549 --> 00:16:15,551

Great job, Dad.

00:16:15,751 --> 00:16:18,156

I can tell from your tone

you think it's my fault.

00:16:18,156 --> 00:16:20,060

It is your fault.

You encouraged them.

00:16:20,060 --> 00:16:21,228

By doing nothing?

00:16:21,228 --> 00:16:22,463

Yes.

00:16:22,463 --> 00:16:24,200

Well, look, in a few

minutes, they'll come in here,

00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,806

remove your head, and

make me king, which will

00:16:26,806 --> 00:16:28,175

be pretty bad for both of us.

00:16:28,175 --> 00:16:30,179

So we're kind of

in this together.

00:16:30,179 --> 00:16:31,616

You were supposed to fail.

00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:33,219

Well, I'm sorry I failed you.

00:16:33,219 --> 00:16:35,123

I wish I could get away

with doing less like you,

00:16:35,123 --> 00:16:36,893

but I can't and--

00:16:36,893 --> 00:16:38,095

I guess I'm jealous.

00:16:38,095 --> 00:16:40,032

I don't have what

you have, Dad.

00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,101

Well, you have

something I don't.

00:16:41,101 --> 00:16:42,538

You were right.

00:16:42,538 --> 00:16:44,341

I only get away with

doing less because people

00:16:44,341 --> 00:16:46,178

like you pick up the slack.

00:16:46,178 --> 00:16:47,748

Well, someone has

to pick up the slack.

00:16:47,748 --> 00:16:48,951

Someone has to be in charge.

00:16:48,951 --> 00:16:50,253

I agree.

00:16:50,253 --> 00:16:52,156

Someone has to be

the one they yell at,

00:16:52,156 --> 00:16:53,927

the one they complain about,

the one whose flat ass

00:16:53,927 --> 00:16:54,962

they make fun of.

00:16:54,962 --> 00:16:56,298

They do what?

00:16:56,298 --> 00:16:57,801

We can't talk about

your ass right now.

00:16:57,801 --> 00:16:59,104

They're storming the castle.

00:16:59,104 --> 00:17:01,977

My point is, they always

have to dislike someone.

00:17:01,977 --> 00:17:03,145

It's sport for them.

00:17:03,145 --> 00:17:04,381

That's it.

00:17:04,381 --> 00:17:06,084

Dad, I want to make

an announcement.

00:17:06,084 --> 00:17:07,555

Do you think you could

get them to listen

00:17:07,555 --> 00:17:09,559

to me for just a little

bit without killing me?

00:17:09,559 --> 00:17:12,998

I think I'm likable

enough to pull that off.

00:17:12,998 --> 00:17:14,267

Well, this is fun.

00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:15,971

Never been in one

of these before.

00:17:15,971 --> 00:17:17,107

I always flew over

them but never had

00:17:17,107 --> 00:17:18,643

occasion to see the inside.

00:17:18,643 --> 00:17:20,480

Come on, Mom, change us back.

00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:22,083

I will if you

admit that parenting

00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:23,285

is a form of torture.

00:17:23,285 --> 00:17:24,655

Are you guys

from around here?

00:17:24,655 --> 00:17:26,759

I don't recognize you

from my flock echelon.

00:17:26,759 --> 00:17:29,599

Oh, I'm sorry you felt

motherly love for half a day.

00:17:29,599 --> 00:17:32,270

- Against my will.

- Welcome to the club.

00:17:32,270 --> 00:17:34,041

Hey, what do you guys

think happens in here?

00:17:34,041 --> 00:17:35,042

You die.

00:17:35,042 --> 00:17:36,311

What?

00:17:36,311 --> 00:17:38,684

No, no.

No, no, no, no.

00:17:38,684 --> 00:17:39,752

Get off me!

00:17:39,752 --> 00:17:41,454

Ah!

00:17:41,454 --> 00:17:43,860

You're going to die rather

than get us out of this?

00:17:43,860 --> 00:17:46,298

Oh, I won't die.

00:17:46,298 --> 00:17:48,302

Oh my God, what is happening?

00:17:48,302 --> 00:17:51,743

I'm the goddess Deliria,

that's what's happening.

00:17:51,743 --> 00:17:53,781

True form.

00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:55,082

Oh, give me a moment.

00:17:55,082 --> 00:17:56,520

True form.

00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:59,458

Oh, goddess Deliria,

please forgive me.

00:17:59,458 --> 00:18:01,896

I'll take whatever

punishment you demand.

00:18:01,896 --> 00:18:03,867

How about a sacrifice?

00:18:03,867 --> 00:18:05,369

Seriously?

00:18:05,369 --> 00:18:07,040

Well, if it's such a joy

to give your life for someone

00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:09,410

else, you should love this.

00:18:09,410 --> 00:18:12,651

OK, Mom, I agree,

unconditional love is torture.

00:18:12,651 --> 00:18:14,420

Thank you.

00:18:18,095 --> 00:18:20,266

Oh, this really is torture.

00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:23,573

I don't know how

you mortals do it.

00:18:23,573 --> 00:18:25,143

Oh, yes.

00:18:25,143 --> 00:18:29,518

And since you almost

killed me, let's do this.

00:18:32,958 --> 00:18:34,995

Hey!

00:18:34,995 --> 00:18:36,866

Hey, hey, hey!

00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:39,939

[mob yelling]

00:18:39,939 --> 00:18:41,208

Get him!

00:18:41,208 --> 00:18:42,945

Hang on, hang on,

I'm king now.

00:18:42,945 --> 00:18:44,314

If only for a moment.

00:18:44,314 --> 00:18:46,552

Not how that works,

for the record, but go on.

00:18:46,552 --> 00:18:48,389

And though it

pains me to order

00:18:48,389 --> 00:18:52,364

anyone to do anything, I order

you to listen to Tyrannis.

00:18:52,364 --> 00:18:55,002

Thank you, Father.

00:18:55,102 --> 00:18:58,142

Kolax, you joined them?

00:18:58,142 --> 00:19:00,647

I knew which way

the wind was blowing.

00:19:00,647 --> 00:19:01,583

Hippo?

00:19:01,716 --> 00:19:04,254

I didn't get this far

by not joining any mobs.

00:19:04,254 --> 00:19:06,191

I do what I have to do.

00:19:06,191 --> 00:19:07,795

OK, listen,

I tell people what

00:19:07,795 --> 00:19:11,268

to do because I want society to

make everyone's lives better.

00:19:11,268 --> 00:19:12,872

And you all hate

me for doing that.

00:19:12,872 --> 00:19:15,677

And of course, I know it's

not me you actually hate.

00:19:15,677 --> 00:19:17,380

It would be anyone

in my position.

00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:18,716

We wouldn't hate Shlub.

00:19:18,716 --> 00:19:21,488

- But you'd hate someone.

- Yeah, you.

00:19:21,488 --> 00:19:23,259

Once again,

I take that to mean

00:19:23,359 --> 00:19:25,329

whoever is giving you orders.

00:19:25,329 --> 00:19:27,668

So for those who want

to see things get done,

00:19:27,668 --> 00:19:29,905

those who want to stop people

from bothering everyone,

00:19:30,005 --> 00:19:33,279

and those who want to watch

those two groups fight,

00:19:33,279 --> 00:19:36,585

I give you local government.

00:19:36,585 --> 00:19:38,656

From now on,

the city will be divided

00:19:38,656 --> 00:19:41,529

into tiny little

neighborhood kingdoms, where

00:19:41,529 --> 00:19:43,833

representatives of the

people can argue and argue

00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:46,471

about anything they like

while the actual people

00:19:46,471 --> 00:19:48,543

watch and judge and enjoy.

00:19:48,543 --> 00:19:50,581

So how are

the representatives chosen?

00:19:50,681 --> 00:19:52,918

Exactly the kind of

thing you can argue about.

00:19:52,918 --> 00:19:55,289

Well, I don't want

a little neighborhood kingdom.

00:19:55,289 --> 00:19:57,126

Take it up with

your local councilman.

00:19:57,126 --> 00:19:58,763

- Who's that?

- You get to decide.

00:19:58,763 --> 00:20:01,034

- Well, it's not me.

- It's not me either.

00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:02,470

Well, someone's got to do it.

00:20:02,470 --> 00:20:04,474

Uh, have we voted on that?

00:20:04,474 --> 00:20:06,880

Did anyone make a resolution?

00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:08,550

I didn't hear one.

00:20:08,550 --> 00:20:09,585

No.

No.

00:20:09,585 --> 00:20:11,454

We didn't--

- Well, look at that.

00:20:11,454 --> 00:20:13,492

You did it.

- They like me?

00:20:13,492 --> 00:20:15,831

No, they're just too

distracted to hate you.

00:20:15,831 --> 00:20:16,999

Just as good.

00:20:19,939 --> 00:20:20,974

Come on, don't be shy.

00:20:21,074 --> 00:20:22,711

The new bridge is

completely safe.

00:20:22,711 --> 00:20:25,249

You're absolutely certain

that this one won't collapse?

00:20:25,249 --> 00:20:26,384

Couldn't be more sure.

00:20:26,384 --> 00:20:28,055

Because you've

said that before.

00:20:28,055 --> 00:20:30,594

Look, if this is going to be

some relitigation of the past,

00:20:30,594 --> 00:20:32,263

I mean, what do

you want me to say?

00:20:32,263 --> 00:20:33,499

OK, all right.

00:20:33,499 --> 00:20:34,802

You want me to say

that I was stupid?

00:20:34,802 --> 00:20:36,405

That I was dumb to build

a bridge out of mud?

00:20:36,405 --> 00:20:37,774

I'm not saying that.

00:20:37,774 --> 00:20:39,611

I used the best information

that was available

00:20:39,712 --> 00:20:40,580

to me at the time.

00:20:40,580 --> 00:20:41,682

I looked at mud,

and I was like, well,

00:20:41,816 --> 00:20:44,555

that stuff works for huts,

it works for covering walls,

00:20:44,555 --> 00:20:46,926

it works for roofs,

it even works for ovens.

00:20:46,926 --> 00:20:48,028

I made ovens out of mud.

00:20:48,028 --> 00:20:49,197

No one could have known.

00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:52,303

You plop it down, you let it

dry, it's as hard as a rock.

00:20:52,303 --> 00:20:53,406

And I was like,

well, this stuff

00:20:53,406 --> 00:20:54,942

even comes from the river.

00:20:54,942 --> 00:20:55,978

The logic is sound.

00:20:55,978 --> 00:20:57,347

It made perfect sense.

00:20:57,347 --> 00:21:00,219

My mistake was, I didn't

account for wetness.

00:21:00,219 --> 00:21:01,655

That's key, isn't it?

00:21:01,655 --> 00:21:04,928

So I asked myself,

what can get wet and then dry

00:21:05,028 --> 00:21:06,131

super fast?

00:21:06,131 --> 00:21:07,568

And it hit me.

- Oh, no.

00:21:07,568 --> 00:21:08,970

Sand.

00:21:08,970 --> 00:21:10,239

[chuckles]

00:21:10,239 --> 00:21:11,976

[all shouting]

00:21:11,976 --> 00:21:13,513

You suck, Ty!

00:21:13,513 --> 00:21:15,750

We don't need a bridge.

00:21:16,117 --> 00:21:17,486

Did you get any of that?

00:21:20,059 --> 00:21:21,695

Bento.