Мужчина Женщина Стол Стулья Еда

00:00:04,643 --> 00:00:06,012

We go through them so fast,

00:00:06,045 --> 00:00:07,481

and you never have a hog

when you need one.

00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:09,318

Asskill:

Well, I'm happy to help out.

00:00:09,352 --> 00:00:11,456

If I've got a spare hog

lying around, it's yours.

00:00:11,489 --> 00:00:14,095

Tyrannis: Oh, and, um, also,

thank you for not eating me.

00:00:14,095 --> 00:00:15,364

I don't say that enough.

00:00:15,430 --> 00:00:17,969

Oh, come on!

I'd never eat you.

00:00:18,003 --> 00:00:21,409

-You're all bone.

-I appreciate that.

00:00:21,409 --> 00:00:22,646

Ooh! Caravan!

00:00:22,646 --> 00:00:24,481

We don't get many

travelers through here,

00:00:24,516 --> 00:00:27,956

and we certainly don't get

many pretty lady travelers.

00:00:27,990 --> 00:00:29,258

[Horse neighs]

00:00:29,325 --> 00:00:30,862

Hello there.

Welcome to the area,

00:00:30,862 --> 00:00:33,199

or as I like to call it...

the area.

00:00:33,232 --> 00:00:35,070

I'm sorry. I thought something

would come to me.

00:00:35,070 --> 00:00:37,542

Anyway, what brings you h-here?

00:00:37,609 --> 00:00:40,715

I'm Sophie, these are my guys.

We're mapmakers.

00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:42,619

Map...makers.

00:00:42,619 --> 00:00:45,090

Have you not heard of maps?

They're the next big thing.

00:00:45,157 --> 00:00:46,627

They help you find

where you're going.

00:00:46,627 --> 00:00:48,263

Like, if you needed to

get from here to Thebes,

00:00:48,296 --> 00:00:50,000

how would you do that?

00:00:50,100 --> 00:00:52,271

Well, I'd ask our finder.

We have this guy Casey.

00:00:52,305 --> 00:00:54,710

His whole job is just

knowing how to get places.

00:00:54,710 --> 00:00:56,146

He's not that great, though,

00:00:56,179 --> 00:00:57,481

unless you're looking

for a brothel.

00:00:57,515 --> 00:00:59,118

Oh, we have a great

finder--Loretta.

00:00:59,151 --> 00:01:00,722

Every city has a finder.

00:01:00,789 --> 00:01:02,859

Well, every city's finder

is about to kill themselves

00:01:02,892 --> 00:01:04,930

because this is a map.

00:01:04,997 --> 00:01:07,134

See? It shows mountains,

rivers, paths,

00:01:07,134 --> 00:01:09,239

and of course

all the important cities.

00:01:09,272 --> 00:01:11,376

And there we are.

We're an important city!

00:01:11,443 --> 00:01:14,115

I'm an important king!

Oh, shame.

00:01:14,115 --> 00:01:16,019

Looks like Killassas

didn't make it this time.

00:01:16,086 --> 00:01:18,456

I understand,

but they've come so far.

00:01:18,524 --> 00:01:20,962

-Oh, Killassas is on there.

-That's not Krapopolis?

00:01:20,996 --> 00:01:22,566

No. Krapopolis isn't on the map.

00:01:22,566 --> 00:01:25,037

And Killassas is?!

It's barely a city!

00:01:25,103 --> 00:01:26,673

No offense.

00:01:26,673 --> 00:01:28,677

Hey. I'm selling these things.

To get on the map,

00:01:28,677 --> 00:01:30,848

a city has to have something

a traveler's gonna care about.

00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,218

We're a democracy!

00:01:32,284 --> 00:01:33,721

They're a city of cannibals!

00:01:33,755 --> 00:01:35,323

Again, no offense.

00:01:35,357 --> 00:01:37,394

It's the "no offense"

that's starting to bug me.

00:01:37,427 --> 00:01:39,566

City of cannibals is

exactly the kind of thing

00:01:39,599 --> 00:01:42,004

a traveler wants on the map

so they can steer clear.

00:01:42,037 --> 00:01:43,741

What about your city is

as useful to know

00:01:43,741 --> 00:01:45,377

as "They eat people here"?

00:01:45,411 --> 00:01:47,415

We have a very nice place

to poo.

00:01:47,415 --> 00:01:49,118

Everywhere has

a nice place to poo.

00:01:49,151 --> 00:01:50,956

Do you have a restaurant?

00:01:51,022 --> 00:01:52,559

-We could.

-Tell you what.

00:01:52,593 --> 00:01:54,195

We're coming back around

in a few days.

00:01:54,262 --> 00:01:55,999

If you've got a decent

restaurant by then,

00:01:56,032 --> 00:01:57,300

I'll put you on the map.

00:01:57,334 --> 00:02:00,007

-Restaurant.

-Hey. could you take

00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:01,643

our city off the map?

00:02:01,677 --> 00:02:04,181

-Travelers are 60% of our diet.

-Oh, I don't know.

00:02:04,181 --> 00:02:06,052

Travelers really

should be warned about--

00:02:06,052 --> 00:02:07,922

please remove us,

or we'll eat you.

00:02:07,956 --> 00:02:09,659

Will do!

00:02:26,225 --> 00:02:28,197

Singers: ♪ Huh huh huh huh

00:02:28,230 --> 00:02:32,404

♪ Huh huh huh whoo

00:02:36,078 --> 00:02:37,481

It's called a map,

00:02:37,516 --> 00:02:39,185

and it shows

where everything is.

00:02:39,218 --> 00:02:40,855

Casey's gonna kill himself.

00:02:40,855 --> 00:02:42,525

That's the least

of our problems.

00:02:42,559 --> 00:02:44,563

I didn't mean that, Casey.

We'll find you another job.

00:02:44,596 --> 00:02:45,664

Casey: Ohh.

00:02:45,731 --> 00:02:47,769

Why is it the least

of our problems?

00:02:47,769 --> 00:02:49,773

Because it shows

every significant city

00:02:49,806 --> 00:02:51,109

in the modern world

00:02:51,209 --> 00:02:52,578

with the notable

exception of mine.

00:02:52,578 --> 00:02:54,048

You mean ours.

00:02:54,115 --> 00:02:55,116

Deliria: I don't think mortals

should know

00:02:55,150 --> 00:02:56,485

where things are.

00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,256

It's more fun

to watch them wander.

00:02:58,256 --> 00:02:59,391

The cities who don't get on

this thing are

00:02:59,391 --> 00:03:00,695

going to be left in the dust.

00:03:00,695 --> 00:03:01,997

I have to be on it!

00:03:01,997 --> 00:03:03,466

-We.

-Look Kissuria's a city

00:03:03,501 --> 00:03:05,270

you can't even get to,

and it's on the map.

00:03:05,270 --> 00:03:07,508

Wait, that's

where Kissuria is?

00:03:07,508 --> 00:03:09,278

Past the Ice Mountains

of Death all the way

00:03:09,345 --> 00:03:11,349

on the other side

of the Uncrossable Chasm?

00:03:11,382 --> 00:03:13,019

I always thought

it was reachable.

00:03:13,052 --> 00:03:14,556

Well, now you know it's not,

00:03:14,556 --> 00:03:16,293

but what you don't know,

looking at this map,

00:03:16,359 --> 00:03:18,262

is that my city exists.

00:03:18,262 --> 00:03:20,034

-Our city.

-And that's why we're

00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,269

opening a restaurant.

00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:22,672

Deliria: A restaurant?

00:03:22,672 --> 00:03:24,141

The thing where humans

go to eat

00:03:24,208 --> 00:03:25,778

as if they're worth

serving food to?

00:03:25,778 --> 00:03:27,749

I wouldn't be caught dead

in a restaurant.

00:03:27,782 --> 00:03:29,686

Shlub: I've been caught

dead in several.

00:03:29,752 --> 00:03:31,957

Tyrannis: Well, we need

a restaurant to get on the map,

00:03:31,991 --> 00:03:33,460

and Hippo's gonna be our chef.

00:03:33,527 --> 00:03:35,430

Hippocampus: Me?!

I'm not cooking for people!

00:03:35,430 --> 00:03:37,668

Oh, I forgot. You only care

about yourself.

00:03:37,702 --> 00:03:38,905

Correct.

00:03:38,971 --> 00:03:40,307

Why did I think

that would work?

00:03:40,340 --> 00:03:41,677

Come on!

For once in your life,

00:03:41,677 --> 00:03:43,413

do something for the good

of the city.

00:03:43,446 --> 00:03:45,552

Oh. The city you can't stop

calling your city?

00:03:45,552 --> 00:03:47,187

What is there, some girl,

00:03:47,221 --> 00:03:48,558

some girl you're

trying to impress?

00:03:48,558 --> 00:03:50,060

If you're not

going to cook simply

00:03:50,060 --> 00:03:51,295

to make other people happy,

00:03:51,295 --> 00:03:52,832

how about I appeal to your ego?

00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:56,238

What if someone could be

the best at cooking?

00:03:56,272 --> 00:03:58,778

Well, obviously, it would be me.

00:03:58,778 --> 00:04:00,146

-Prove it.

-I will!

00:04:00,146 --> 00:04:01,717

And I know you just played me,

00:04:01,717 --> 00:04:04,589

but well played

because I am completely in.

00:04:04,623 --> 00:04:06,158

Guess we've got

ourselves a restaurant.

00:04:06,158 --> 00:04:07,929

I guess we have.

00:04:07,996 --> 00:04:09,332

[Cheering]

00:04:09,365 --> 00:04:10,334

Stupendous:

What the hell is this?

00:04:10,367 --> 00:04:11,937

Spike, what is this?

00:04:12,004 --> 00:04:13,674

Spike: They saw the damn map.

00:04:13,708 --> 00:04:16,045

They're celebrating because

those baby-eating bastards

00:04:16,045 --> 00:04:17,916

from Kissuria can't invade us.

00:04:17,916 --> 00:04:19,485

End of an era, huh?

00:04:19,553 --> 00:04:21,790

All my life, I've been

preparing to be invaded

00:04:21,790 --> 00:04:23,359

by the Kissurians.

00:04:23,359 --> 00:04:25,565

I was raised on stories

about those animals,

00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:28,102

how they eat babies,

how they chop off your fingers

00:04:28,169 --> 00:04:30,040

one by one and feed them

to your baby

00:04:30,073 --> 00:04:31,577

and then still eat the baby.

00:04:31,644 --> 00:04:33,312

Don't forget the butt sewing.

00:04:33,312 --> 00:04:35,752

The most twisted, vile

battlefield torture

00:04:35,785 --> 00:04:38,456

ever conceived--

sewing your butt closed

00:04:38,524 --> 00:04:40,995

and then force feeding you

till you explode?

00:04:41,028 --> 00:04:44,301

Hey, guys! We don't need

our butt guards anymore.

00:04:44,334 --> 00:04:45,939

Throw them on the fire!

00:04:45,972 --> 00:04:47,642

[Cheering]

00:04:47,642 --> 00:04:49,178

Stupendous:

Look at them, goofing around,

00:04:49,211 --> 00:04:50,548

not a care in the world.

00:04:50,615 --> 00:04:52,384

I can't let that happen to me.

00:04:52,384 --> 00:04:54,623

I am keeping this butt guard

and these finger holders

00:04:54,623 --> 00:04:57,529

until I have properly

killed those Kissurian bastards

00:04:57,529 --> 00:04:59,098

on a field of battle!

00:04:59,098 --> 00:05:00,535

Spike: Hell, yeah! I'm in!

00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:02,572

Let's go kick some ass!

00:05:06,379 --> 00:05:10,120

Hello, and welcome to Ty's Man

Woman Table Chairs Food.

00:05:10,153 --> 00:05:11,823

Catchy name.

00:05:11,890 --> 00:05:13,760

Have you eaten

in a restaurant before?

00:05:13,794 --> 00:05:16,365

We've never eaten

indoors before.

00:05:16,398 --> 00:05:19,338

Well, you're in for a treat.

00:05:19,372 --> 00:05:20,675

Let me tell you how it works.

00:05:20,675 --> 00:05:22,378

You order food, we cook it.

00:05:22,378 --> 00:05:23,714

It's really that simple.

00:05:23,781 --> 00:05:25,384

-Do we have to kill it?

-Nope.

00:05:25,384 --> 00:05:26,820

-Gut it?

-Nope.

00:05:26,887 --> 00:05:29,024

Skin it, bleed it,

make it into chunks?

00:05:29,091 --> 00:05:30,661

Nope! We do all that for you.

00:05:30,695 --> 00:05:33,333

Should be called

Ty's Kill Gut Skin Bleed

00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:36,439

Man Woman Table Chairs

Food Chunks Eat.

00:05:36,507 --> 00:05:38,376

We will certainly take

a look at that.

00:05:38,409 --> 00:05:40,413

So I can order anything?

00:05:40,413 --> 00:05:42,150

No. I should have

been more specific.

00:05:42,184 --> 00:05:44,155

You can order any amount

of one thing,

00:05:44,155 --> 00:05:46,125

and that thing is chicken,

00:05:46,159 --> 00:05:48,029

and the amount

can't be too much.

00:05:48,062 --> 00:05:51,135

Great. We'll have one.

00:05:51,168 --> 00:05:52,839

Hippo, we've got our

first customers,

00:05:52,839 --> 00:05:54,977

and they will have

one delicious chicken.

00:05:55,010 --> 00:05:58,250

Chicken is child's play.

Every cook can make chicken.

00:05:58,283 --> 00:06:00,287

I'm making octopus.

00:06:00,287 --> 00:06:02,559

Octopus?

Humans don't eat octopus.

00:06:02,592 --> 00:06:04,930

You should. All they talk

about is eating you.

00:06:04,963 --> 00:06:06,332

OK. Noted.

00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:08,102

Seriously,

they have 17 different words

00:06:08,136 --> 00:06:09,740

for human meat.

00:06:09,773 --> 00:06:11,576

They're crossbreeding

themselves to become giant.

00:06:11,576 --> 00:06:13,245

Point taken,

but this is just supposed to be

00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:14,682

a simple,

functioning restaurant.

00:06:14,716 --> 00:06:17,487

Wrong! It's a test of my genius.

00:06:17,555 --> 00:06:19,458

I tenderized this thing

precisely

00:06:19,491 --> 00:06:20,995

for the best mouthfeel.

00:06:21,028 --> 00:06:23,299

I seared it the perfect

amount for caramelizing,

00:06:23,332 --> 00:06:25,037

and here--lemon juice.

00:06:25,070 --> 00:06:26,539

Enhances the flavor.

00:06:26,573 --> 00:06:28,109

This is scientifically

delicious.

00:06:28,175 --> 00:06:29,779

Taste.

00:06:31,684 --> 00:06:34,890

Oh! Oh, Hippo.

You're a genius.

00:06:34,957 --> 00:06:36,459

I just said that.

00:06:36,459 --> 00:06:38,429

What is that thing your eyes

are doing?

00:06:38,463 --> 00:06:40,334

Showing pleasure?

00:06:40,367 --> 00:06:42,739

Yeah, but why does

it feel good to me?

00:06:42,739 --> 00:06:45,276

Because there's a simple

joy in making people happy?

00:06:45,309 --> 00:06:47,013

That can't be it.

Wait a minute.

00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,484

The satisfaction of the eater

is how I can measure

00:06:49,484 --> 00:06:51,088

my greatness!

00:06:51,121 --> 00:06:54,929

You think the people out there

will make the same face?

00:06:54,929 --> 00:06:58,203

Mmm! Oh, my God.

00:06:58,203 --> 00:07:00,340

Mmm!

00:07:00,374 --> 00:07:01,610

Feels good, right?

00:07:01,610 --> 00:07:03,614

Feels great! Let's go, people.

00:07:03,648 --> 00:07:05,250

Fire up the grill!

00:07:05,284 --> 00:07:07,420

I got an idea

for a new oyster dish!

00:07:07,487 --> 00:07:09,124

Do they hate humans, too?

00:07:09,158 --> 00:07:10,427

Hmm. Let me think.

00:07:10,460 --> 00:07:11,596

Do you steal their jewelry?

00:07:11,630 --> 00:07:14,067

All right! Let's start shucking!

00:07:17,742 --> 00:07:19,946

Hi. Welcome to Ty's Man Woman

00:07:19,980 --> 00:07:21,482

Table Chairs Food.

00:07:21,516 --> 00:07:23,620

Man: The branding is all wrong,

but the food.

00:07:23,654 --> 00:07:25,490

Woman: He does a thing

with octopus.

00:07:25,558 --> 00:07:26,926

Trust me.

00:07:26,993 --> 00:07:28,797

You need to

put octopus on the sign.

00:07:28,831 --> 00:07:30,634

Tyrannis: Can I be in charge

of the name, please?

00:07:30,668 --> 00:07:32,539

Wait. They kill it

and gut it, too?

00:07:32,572 --> 00:07:36,412

Yeah. The sign is

very misleading.

00:07:36,445 --> 00:07:38,416

Hippocampus: More turmeric.

00:07:38,450 --> 00:07:39,953

Getting there.

00:07:39,953 --> 00:07:41,322

Start over!

00:07:41,389 --> 00:07:42,825

Chef, I made this chicken.

00:07:42,892 --> 00:07:44,461

Be honest. What do you think?

00:07:44,529 --> 00:07:45,698

What is it? Boiled?

00:07:45,765 --> 00:07:47,200

And you didn't even pluck it!

00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:48,503

Casey, you're fired.

00:07:48,537 --> 00:07:51,041

Please. I can't lose

another job.

00:07:51,041 --> 00:07:53,847

Then stay,

but don't touch anything.

00:07:53,914 --> 00:07:55,250

Tyrannis: Hello, hello, hello.

00:07:55,283 --> 00:07:56,486

Great business out there.

00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:57,556

How's it going back here?

00:07:57,622 --> 00:08:00,260

Ty, I'm crushing this.

00:08:00,293 --> 00:08:01,730

It's like with science

00:08:01,796 --> 00:08:03,734

I make something,

and it's done,

00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,807

but with food, what I'm

making is deliciousness,

00:08:06,807 --> 00:08:08,511

and there's no

upper limit to that,

00:08:08,578 --> 00:08:11,015

or if there is,

I intend to find it.

00:08:11,015 --> 00:08:12,484

That's why we do it!

00:08:12,551 --> 00:08:14,254

So anyway, table 8 would like

the octopus dish

00:08:14,254 --> 00:08:15,958

-from yesterday.

-No, no, no.

00:08:15,991 --> 00:08:18,429

The octopus dish from yesterday

won't enthrall them

00:08:18,429 --> 00:08:19,699

like it did yesterday.

00:08:19,699 --> 00:08:21,135

I'm sure they'll be fine

with it.

00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:23,306

I just told you

I'm not working for fine.

00:08:23,340 --> 00:08:24,843

I'm working for better

than anything,

00:08:24,909 --> 00:08:26,980

and better than anything

keeps getting redefined

00:08:27,014 --> 00:08:28,550

every time I cook.

00:08:28,584 --> 00:08:30,454

I worry that redefining

greatness is getting away

00:08:30,487 --> 00:08:31,890

from the original mission.

00:08:31,957 --> 00:08:33,861

We only need a functioning

restaurant

00:08:33,895 --> 00:08:36,298

-to get on the map.

-Tut, tut, tut.

00:08:40,307 --> 00:08:41,844

Mmm!

00:08:41,844 --> 00:08:43,446

They will get their food,

they will make the face,

00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:45,083

I will be the best,

you will be happy.

00:08:45,116 --> 00:08:47,187

OK. Just don't take too long

to cook the food.

00:08:47,187 --> 00:08:48,623

These people will eat worms.

00:08:48,657 --> 00:08:50,728

And if they do, they will

be the greatest,

00:08:50,728 --> 00:08:54,302

most exquisitely prepared worms

anyone has ever tasted.

00:08:54,302 --> 00:08:55,872

I don't doubt that.

00:08:55,938 --> 00:08:58,877

Bard: ♪ And Deliria's ass

is the finest ass ♪

00:08:58,944 --> 00:09:00,848

♪ That the world has ever seen

00:09:00,882 --> 00:09:03,486

♪ You could bounce a coin

off a perfect little tushy ♪

00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:06,392

Darling, have you heard?

Hippo is quite the chef.

00:09:06,392 --> 00:09:09,064

The line at the restaurant

reaches all around the block.

00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:11,269

In other news,

we have blocks now.

00:09:11,335 --> 00:09:13,472

Interesting,

but I already said

00:09:13,472 --> 00:09:14,709

I had no interest.

00:09:14,743 --> 00:09:16,580

I'm on record.

00:09:16,613 --> 00:09:18,416

♪ She already said she could

not care less ♪

00:09:18,449 --> 00:09:21,222

♪ But now she's curious

about it ♪

00:09:21,255 --> 00:09:22,626

[Screech]

00:09:22,659 --> 00:09:25,230

Ow! Why a cat?!

You know I'm allergic.

00:09:25,263 --> 00:09:27,233

This is over the top!

00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,504

There has to be a give and take.

00:09:28,570 --> 00:09:30,173

Haven't I earned that?

00:09:30,206 --> 00:09:31,876

Now I'm all the way outside,

00:09:31,910 --> 00:09:34,982

and both of my hands

are cats? Why?!

00:09:35,016 --> 00:09:36,051

[Cats yowling]

00:09:36,118 --> 00:09:37,387

What if we went

to the restaurant

00:09:37,487 --> 00:09:38,858

but not as ourselves?

00:09:38,858 --> 00:09:41,328

Shlub: I'm always up

for some roleplay.

00:09:41,395 --> 00:09:42,799

Ooh. look at us.

00:09:42,865 --> 00:09:44,702

[Exaggerated voice]

I'm Cato, a potter.

00:09:44,736 --> 00:09:47,441

[Exaggerated voice]

And I'm Dolores, a milkmaid.

00:09:47,508 --> 00:09:49,044

And we're not married

00:09:49,044 --> 00:09:51,415

Ooh. We're playing

with fire, aren't we?

00:09:51,448 --> 00:09:53,687

Ooh! If my husband

were to find out.

00:09:53,754 --> 00:09:57,193

Would he fly

into a violent rage?

00:09:57,227 --> 00:09:59,700

We're gonna have to

try less sexy disguises,

00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:02,705

or we'll never make it

to the restaurant.

00:10:07,414 --> 00:10:09,185

[Grunting]

00:10:09,218 --> 00:10:10,988

Aah!

00:10:11,021 --> 00:10:12,124

Unh!

00:10:12,124 --> 00:10:14,295

Aah! Oof!

00:10:14,361 --> 00:10:15,998

[Both grunt]

00:10:21,108 --> 00:10:22,612

[Spike groans]

00:10:22,679 --> 00:10:24,147

Stupendous: No!

00:10:28,122 --> 00:10:29,992

[Grunting]

00:10:37,976 --> 00:10:38,944

Huh?

00:10:38,978 --> 00:10:41,082

This is the Uncrossable Chasm?

00:10:41,082 --> 00:10:43,520

It's way more uncrossable

than I thought.

00:10:43,554 --> 00:10:45,691

Damn it!

00:10:45,758 --> 00:10:47,962

Man: Damn it!

00:10:47,962 --> 00:10:50,601

Wait. Are you an echo

or a person?

00:10:50,701 --> 00:10:53,206

Man: Wait. Are you

an echo or a person?

00:10:53,272 --> 00:10:54,976

No, wait. You go first.

00:10:54,976 --> 00:10:57,281

Man: No, I want to go first.

00:10:57,281 --> 00:10:59,117

That's what I--hey!

00:10:59,151 --> 00:11:03,092

I am Babak

of the Kissurian people.

00:11:03,092 --> 00:11:06,733

I am Stupendous of Krapopolis.

00:11:06,733 --> 00:11:09,304

-We got maps.

-So did we.

00:11:09,304 --> 00:11:11,275

I came here to kick your ass!

00:11:11,308 --> 00:11:13,848

Same. I had hoped

the Uncrossable Chasm

00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:15,818

was a hyperbolic nickname.

00:11:15,818 --> 00:11:18,256

Me, too.

Like the Bottomless Lake.

00:11:18,289 --> 00:11:22,230

No, I have been there.

That thing is bottomless.

00:11:22,263 --> 00:11:26,507

Huh. Well, I'm not leaving

without kicking your ass.

00:11:26,573 --> 00:11:28,576

Ohh--

00:11:28,576 --> 00:11:31,081

-We should build a bridge.

-Agreed,

00:11:31,115 --> 00:11:33,119

and this is not gonna be

one of those things

00:11:33,119 --> 00:11:35,323

where we realize

we work better together.

00:11:35,357 --> 00:11:36,760

Absolutely not.

00:11:36,793 --> 00:11:39,464

Once the bridge is built,

you die.

00:11:41,035 --> 00:11:43,607

Tyrannis: Oh, wow!

The joint is jumping.

00:11:43,607 --> 00:11:45,611

Welcome to Ty's Man Woman

Table Chairs

00:11:45,611 --> 00:11:47,013

Different Types of Food.

00:11:47,047 --> 00:11:48,883

There's just a bit of a wait.

00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:51,923

Should be called Ty's Man Woman

Wait Table Chairs Diff--

00:11:51,990 --> 00:11:53,761

Can I be in charge

of the name, please?

00:11:53,794 --> 00:11:55,564

Fine.

Oh, there's some lady

00:11:55,598 --> 00:11:57,100

back there who says

she's a mapmaker.

00:11:57,166 --> 00:12:00,239

She's here? Sophie,

welcome to my restaurant.

00:12:00,306 --> 00:12:02,945

Is it even a restaurant?

So far, it's just a line.

00:12:02,979 --> 00:12:04,516

It's a restaurant!

00:12:04,549 --> 00:12:05,751

We're just working out

a few kinks.

00:12:05,785 --> 00:12:07,187

You're gonna love it, though.

00:12:07,187 --> 00:12:08,957

I'll be the judge

of that, though.

00:12:08,990 --> 00:12:10,661

♪ Love our playful banter

00:12:10,695 --> 00:12:12,497

Just want food.

00:12:14,502 --> 00:12:16,338

[Grunting]

00:12:20,413 --> 00:12:24,488

-Aah!

-Arrr!

00:12:24,522 --> 00:12:29,030

I will remove your head

and parade it around my city!

00:12:29,064 --> 00:12:30,901

I'll put your corpse on a pole

00:12:30,935 --> 00:12:33,072

and use strings to move

your arms and mouth

00:12:33,139 --> 00:12:35,678

and make it seem like

you're saying bad things.

00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:37,147

Like what?

00:12:37,214 --> 00:12:39,786

Like "Hi. I'm Babak,

and I eat babies."

00:12:39,819 --> 00:12:41,355

[Grunting]

00:12:41,421 --> 00:12:42,858

Why would I eat babies?

00:12:42,958 --> 00:12:45,330

You Krapopolites

are the baby eaters.

00:12:45,330 --> 00:12:47,568

That's a lie!

We fight with honor.

00:12:47,602 --> 00:12:50,073

I love that sword!

00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:53,446

-[Screaming]

-[Grunting]

00:12:53,446 --> 00:12:56,987

You're the ones who sew people's

butts closed like cowards.

00:12:57,020 --> 00:12:59,992

We did that one or two times

as a joke.

00:12:59,992 --> 00:13:02,932

Meanwhile, you people do

nothing but suck out

00:13:02,965 --> 00:13:07,373

your enemies' eyeballs

and feed them to your babies.

00:13:07,373 --> 00:13:09,345

Stupendous: I strongly

reprimanded the soldier

00:13:09,445 --> 00:13:12,952

-who did that.

-Aah!

00:13:12,985 --> 00:13:14,421

-Wait, wait.

-What?

00:13:14,454 --> 00:13:16,458

You want to kiss me

before I kill you?

00:13:16,491 --> 00:13:17,828

That ain't happening.

00:13:17,828 --> 00:13:19,632

No. Why would I want

to kiss you?

00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:21,268

It happens more often

than you think.

00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:23,540

Sometimes, signals get

crossed in the brain.

00:13:23,540 --> 00:13:24,976

No. I--I can see that.

00:13:25,010 --> 00:13:26,980

No. The reason I said wait is

00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:29,350

does anyone know you're here?

00:13:29,384 --> 00:13:30,754

-No.

-Look.

00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:32,356

You're gonna kill me,

which is fine.

00:13:32,356 --> 00:13:33,860

I accept that.

00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:35,531

Then I fall

into the Uncrossable Chasm,

00:13:35,531 --> 00:13:40,373

so I die down there,

but I got your leg pretty good.

00:13:40,373 --> 00:13:43,514

You won't make it back

across those mountains.

00:13:43,614 --> 00:13:45,818

You die on an ice shelf

somewhere,

00:13:45,884 --> 00:13:47,320

and then what are we?

00:13:47,354 --> 00:13:49,659

A couple of dead fools who

died in a place

00:13:49,692 --> 00:13:51,563

no one's ever gonna go to.

00:13:51,629 --> 00:13:54,502

Frigging maps. Get up here!

00:13:57,274 --> 00:13:59,344

It was gonna be so cool

watching you

00:13:59,378 --> 00:14:00,847

fall all that way.

00:14:00,881 --> 00:14:03,286

I would have screamed

all the way down for you.

00:14:03,352 --> 00:14:09,364

Aaaaaaaaah!

00:14:09,364 --> 00:14:14,508

[Trailing off]

00:14:14,542 --> 00:14:16,412

Don't rub it in.

00:14:16,479 --> 00:14:17,782

We can do this.

00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:18,984

We just have to come

up with the most

00:14:19,050 --> 00:14:21,254

unsexy personas imaginable.

00:14:21,254 --> 00:14:23,226

Let's try this.

00:14:23,292 --> 00:14:25,864

[Exaggerated voice]

I'm Sol, a plain old man.

00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:28,937

I'm married to my job,

which is counting beans.

00:14:29,004 --> 00:14:30,774

[Exaggerated voice]

And I'm Helen.

00:14:30,774 --> 00:14:33,346

I have severe body odor

and a stump for a leg.

00:14:33,379 --> 00:14:35,383

[Normal voice]

How big of a stump?

00:14:35,450 --> 00:14:37,889

[Exaggerated voice] Why don't

you find out, Mr. Bean Counter?

00:14:37,889 --> 00:14:39,491

[Moaning]

00:14:39,559 --> 00:14:41,262

[Exaggerated voice] I'm

an absolute douchebag

00:14:41,328 --> 00:14:44,903

named Money Man

with disgustingly long toenails.

00:14:44,936 --> 00:14:47,407

[Normal voice]

Ohh! My top 3 weaknesses.

00:14:47,407 --> 00:14:49,111

[Moaning]

00:14:49,144 --> 00:14:51,549

-I'm a jellyfish.

-I'm dead.

00:14:51,582 --> 00:14:53,887

How dead? No wrong answers.

00:14:53,954 --> 00:14:55,256

[Moaning]

00:14:55,323 --> 00:14:56,827

Well, I'm beginning to

think that we may

00:14:56,827 --> 00:14:58,830

never taste Hippo's food.

00:14:58,830 --> 00:15:01,035

Oh, roleplay is

simply too stimulating.

00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,306

I may just have to swallow

my pride and go as myself.

00:15:03,339 --> 00:15:05,042

Bard: ♪ She's swallowing

her pride because ♪

00:15:05,076 --> 00:15:06,478

♪ The roleplay was too sexy

00:15:06,513 --> 00:15:09,050

Who said you could watch,

not sing.

00:15:09,050 --> 00:15:10,821

Hippo, she's here, the map lady.

00:15:10,821 --> 00:15:12,925

We need to get moving. Hippo?

00:15:12,959 --> 00:15:14,763

He's been like this for an hour.

00:15:14,829 --> 00:15:16,498

Brother, brother,

what's going on here?

00:15:16,498 --> 00:15:19,070

I'm just trying to

figure out a bay leaf.

00:15:19,103 --> 00:15:21,943

Hippo, no. Bay leaves are

already figured out.

00:15:21,976 --> 00:15:23,614

They're leaves of bay.

00:15:23,614 --> 00:15:25,684

Chef, table 6 is still

waiting on the salmon.

00:15:25,717 --> 00:15:27,721

-Is it ready?

-Is it ready?

00:15:27,755 --> 00:15:29,825

Let's find out.

00:15:29,859 --> 00:15:32,163

No. It's Average.

00:15:32,196 --> 00:15:35,003

Average is good,

and good is torture.

00:15:35,036 --> 00:15:36,272

Then torture yourself!

00:15:36,338 --> 00:15:38,208

Fine. Casey,

get the salmon out

00:15:38,208 --> 00:15:40,547

of the garbage and serve it up.

00:15:40,581 --> 00:15:43,218

Is it OK if there's

a couple bites missing?

00:15:48,362 --> 00:15:51,035

Hello again,

and welcome to Ty's, just Ty's.

00:15:51,068 --> 00:15:52,805

Your server then explains

the concept

00:15:52,838 --> 00:15:54,174

once you've sat down.

00:15:54,207 --> 00:15:56,211

-I like the name.

-You're the first one.

00:15:56,278 --> 00:15:58,115

Look at that.

Even gods eat here.

00:15:58,148 --> 00:16:00,119

Tell me, son, is this one

of those places

00:16:00,153 --> 00:16:01,990

with peanut shells on the floor?

00:16:02,023 --> 00:16:03,627

It could be.

Excellent because

00:16:03,660 --> 00:16:07,200

on the floor in my scat

are peanut shells.

00:16:07,234 --> 00:16:08,770

I could come back.

00:16:08,804 --> 00:16:10,708

It seems like you're still

working out the kinks.

00:16:10,741 --> 00:16:12,109

No, no, no. Don't leave.

00:16:12,143 --> 00:16:13,514

I'll seat you in just a second.

00:16:13,547 --> 00:16:15,115

Mum, Dad, do not turn this

into a place

00:16:15,149 --> 00:16:16,686

where people don't want to eat.

00:16:16,719 --> 00:16:18,489

Hippocampus: Why not?

Couldn't get any worse.

00:16:18,523 --> 00:16:21,061

He's got me cooking

crap chickens for crap people.

00:16:21,094 --> 00:16:23,099

I thought you were cooking food

worthy of a god.

00:16:23,132 --> 00:16:25,403

I was getting there,

but he stopped me.

00:16:25,436 --> 00:16:28,844

Screw him. Make me something

that would blow my mind.

00:16:28,877 --> 00:16:30,246

I will!

00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:31,883

Can I just have

a piece of chicken?

00:16:31,916 --> 00:16:33,553

I'm so hungry.

I skipped breakfast.

00:16:33,586 --> 00:16:39,364

No. No one eats until

I have pleased this customer.

00:16:39,397 --> 00:16:41,301

Tyrannis: Mother, can I ask you

the biggest of favors?

00:16:41,335 --> 00:16:42,872

Could you just quickly tell

Hippo that he's

00:16:42,905 --> 00:16:44,308

blown your mind,

and be sure to

00:16:44,341 --> 00:16:45,610

roll your eyes back

in your head.

00:16:45,644 --> 00:16:47,013

He likes that.

00:16:47,046 --> 00:16:48,851

If he blows my mind,

I'll let him know.

00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:50,921

[Sizzling]

00:16:50,955 --> 00:16:52,323

Hmm. Interesting.

00:16:52,357 --> 00:16:54,160

Not the best thing you ever had?

00:16:54,194 --> 00:16:55,531

Of course not.

00:16:55,531 --> 00:16:56,800

[Hippocampus sighs]

00:16:56,833 --> 00:16:58,068

[Sizzling]

00:16:58,102 --> 00:16:59,706

It's good for humans or dogs.

00:16:59,739 --> 00:17:01,576

I can't remember

who eats better.

00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:07,120

Hmm. Pleasant.

00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:09,090

Pleasant is the baseline!

00:17:10,895 --> 00:17:12,899

Hippo, the map lady,

she's gonna leave.

00:17:12,932 --> 00:17:14,602

Sophie: Thinking about it.

00:17:24,555 --> 00:17:28,196

It's...quite good

for what it is.

00:17:28,229 --> 00:17:29,766

Hippo, take the win.

00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:32,505

I can't. I can't do it!

00:17:32,538 --> 00:17:36,211

I'm a fraud!

I'm an absolute fraud!

00:17:36,244 --> 00:17:38,750

Why did I ever think I could be

the best at cooking?

00:17:38,783 --> 00:17:40,621

-Mmm!

-Mmm!

00:17:40,654 --> 00:17:41,756

Ha ha ha!

00:17:41,790 --> 00:17:43,325

Everyone, out!

00:17:43,359 --> 00:17:46,165

A delight from start to finish!

We'll dine again!

00:17:46,198 --> 00:17:49,572

I said out! Get out!

00:17:49,605 --> 00:17:50,841

Rah!

00:17:50,875 --> 00:17:53,178

[People shouting]

00:17:53,212 --> 00:17:55,015

I think I've seen

what I need to see.

00:17:55,049 --> 00:17:57,086

Hippocampus: Aah!

00:17:57,120 --> 00:17:58,523

Tyrannis:

Thank you for dining at Ty's

00:17:58,556 --> 00:18:02,030

Walk In Sit Down

Don't Eat Run Away.

00:18:02,063 --> 00:18:03,600

I hate the mapped world.

00:18:03,633 --> 00:18:06,138

It used to be you'd go off on

an adventure.

00:18:06,205 --> 00:18:07,742

You wouldn't know what

you'd find

00:18:07,775 --> 00:18:09,444

or who you'd have to kill.

00:18:09,478 --> 00:18:11,850

Yeah, used to be anyone

could show up

00:18:11,883 --> 00:18:13,452

at your doorstep, anyone?

00:18:13,485 --> 00:18:15,924

My whole army was driven

by the possibility

00:18:15,958 --> 00:18:17,260

of your invasion.

00:18:17,293 --> 00:18:19,665

-Us, too.

-That's why I came here.

00:18:19,699 --> 00:18:22,303

What I really wanted

to fight was that map,

00:18:22,303 --> 00:18:24,307

but I guess the map won.

00:18:24,341 --> 00:18:27,280

Wait, but now the map is wrong.

00:18:27,313 --> 00:18:30,654

This is supposed to be

the Uncrossable Chasm,

00:18:30,687 --> 00:18:32,223

but now it's covered

00:18:32,257 --> 00:18:34,561

by the Dangerous

but Doable Bridge.

00:18:34,595 --> 00:18:37,968

You go home and tell your people

that map is wrong.

00:18:38,001 --> 00:18:39,539

Tell them we're coming,

00:18:39,572 --> 00:18:42,043

and our babies are hungry

for eyeballs.

00:18:42,077 --> 00:18:45,216

-Ha ha ha!

-Ha ha ha!

00:18:45,283 --> 00:18:46,752

[Babak grunts]

00:18:46,786 --> 00:18:49,124

Wait. You think we have

enough battle scars?

00:18:49,157 --> 00:18:50,694

It's got to be realistic.

00:18:50,727 --> 00:18:53,131

Oh, right. You want to just

take this eyeball?

00:18:53,165 --> 00:18:55,135

-Sure.

-You want to sew my butt shut?

00:18:55,169 --> 00:18:59,444

I'd like that.

I'd like that very much.

00:18:59,477 --> 00:19:00,581

[Sobbing]

00:19:00,614 --> 00:19:02,416

-You did this to me.

-I did?

00:19:02,450 --> 00:19:04,387

You let me believe that cooking

00:19:04,421 --> 00:19:06,158

could be

scientifically measurable.

00:19:06,191 --> 00:19:07,695

That's because I couldn't

get you to just cook

00:19:07,728 --> 00:19:09,230

for the sheer pleasure

of doing something

00:19:09,264 --> 00:19:10,499

for someone else.

00:19:10,534 --> 00:19:12,236

Altruism? There's no such thing.

00:19:12,270 --> 00:19:14,407

Helping other people

is always self-serving.

00:19:14,441 --> 00:19:16,344

I built this city

for other people,

00:19:16,378 --> 00:19:18,817

and I wanted a restaurant

for the good of the people.

00:19:18,850 --> 00:19:23,225

Oh, a restaurant called Ty's,

where I did all the work?

00:19:23,258 --> 00:19:24,795

Branding was important!

00:19:24,828 --> 00:19:26,733

You didn't build

this city to help people, Ty.

00:19:26,766 --> 00:19:29,370

You built it to be the guy

who helped people.

00:19:29,404 --> 00:19:31,675

The city was my penis,

wasn't it?

00:19:31,709 --> 00:19:33,245

-What?!

-No.

00:19:33,278 --> 00:19:35,917

I was just saying

it's an extension of my ego.

00:19:35,951 --> 00:19:37,253

Then say that.

00:19:37,286 --> 00:19:39,490

Well, forgive me

for being poetic.

00:19:39,525 --> 00:19:41,462

Casey: Hey, guys.

What's so wrong

00:19:41,495 --> 00:19:44,367

about helping people

for the sake of your own ego?

00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,472

-Huh?

-I mean, you made a city

00:19:46,506 --> 00:19:48,810

to get kudos,

and you cooked

00:19:48,876 --> 00:19:50,680

for the good eye rolls,

00:19:50,714 --> 00:19:53,418

but either way,

you guys gave me a job,

00:19:53,451 --> 00:19:56,191

and I was on the verge

of ending it all in a brothel.

00:19:56,225 --> 00:19:58,663

I'm just saying good

did come out of this,

00:19:58,696 --> 00:20:01,367

whether or not

it's why you did it.

00:20:02,938 --> 00:20:04,440

How do you like the sound

00:20:04,474 --> 00:20:08,381

of Casey's Man Woman Eat Chicken

Table?

00:20:09,752 --> 00:20:12,490

Thanks for coming back.

So was that the best

00:20:12,525 --> 00:20:14,127

whole, boiled, unplucked chicken

00:20:14,194 --> 00:20:16,498

-you've ever had?

-First and hopefully last.

00:20:16,532 --> 00:20:18,736

So good enough to put

us on the map?

00:20:18,770 --> 00:20:20,540

Yeah. I'll make a note

that Krapopolis has

00:20:20,574 --> 00:20:22,410

a restaurant you should

definitely avoid...

00:20:22,443 --> 00:20:24,047

-Oh.

-but a king

00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:25,449

who tries real hard.

00:20:25,483 --> 00:20:28,155

I'll take the win.

Mum, Dad, no!

00:20:28,189 --> 00:20:30,961

My name is Sam the Jellyfish.

00:20:30,994 --> 00:20:33,398

And I'm Jessica,

and I'm dead.

00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:39,745

[Speaking Octopus]

00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,002

Dan Harmon: Did you get

any of that?

00:21:27,908 --> 00:21:29,010

Voice: Bento!

[Cheering]